"I came back to find out how you performed your duties, Annie. I'll begin with the best man. Jim Jackson, give an account of your stewardship."
"Aw had three helpin's o' the plum-duff, twa o' the apple-pie, three o' the—"
"I'm not taking an inventory of your interior furnishings," I said severely; "what I want to know is whether you performed your duties. Did you kiss the bridesmaids?"
"Eh!" gasped Janet, "he'd better try!"
"Do you mean to tell me he didn't?" I demanded.
"Aw had a broken-oot lip," said Jim apologetically, "and Aw didna want to smit onybody."
"And the bairn next door to oor hoose has the measles," he added hastily.
"And Aw lookit at a book aboot etikquette and it didna say onything aboot kissin' the bridesmaids."
"The bridesmaids didna want to kiss yer dirty moo, onywye, Jim Jackson," said Janet.
"Aw've got a better moo than Tam Rigg, onywye," said Jim cheerfully.