I found about thirty thousand troops drawn up in line, extending from the bridge to General Pelissier’s head-quarters. After the salvo of artillery, a most warm reception was given by General MacMahon to General Lüders, both commanders-in-chief remaining at the French head-quarters to receive him. The cavalcade, consisting of French and Russians, set off at a hard gallop along the line of French troops, which extended about four miles. The discharges of cannon and the firing of musketry never ceased. The day was a brilliant one, and the sun’s rays glittered upon the helmets, swords, cuirasses, and bayonets, reflecting myriads of diamonds in the air. The various uniforms of the Staff which accompanied General Lüders, and in particular that of the Cosaques du Don, gave to this martial and animated scene an éclat hardly ever witnessed even at the grandest review, which is generally held on a flat surface, this being cheerfully accidented by hillock and dale. On such occasions, the army is generally formed in square, instead of being in a long line eight files deep on one side only, as on the occasion to which I now refer. The reception by General Pelissier was brilliant, and worthy of that offered to him on the Mackenzie Heights a few days previous.
Amongst the excursions we had projected was one which had been some time pending. It was to be a trip to Yalta by water, where we intended to spend a couple of days. A vessel had been provided, the provisions were ordered, and guests in abundance were invited. A series of fine days had followed, and the whole management was placed in the hands of the person with whom the idea of the excursion originated, the Rev. Mr. Parker. What man amongst the numbers in the Crimea did not know that distinguished, enterprising, and worthy man? His fame extended far and wide, and he was equally celebrated for his benevolence and intelligence; and he never saw a difficulty in anything he undertook, from the building of a church to an hospital, a hut, kitchen, or an ice-house. Workmen and materials were found by him, people hardly knew how or where. Under his clerical wand, wooden palaces were erected, not without difficulty, but still the work was accomplished. If any good provisions arrived in the harbour, the worthy minister was the first to hear of it, and, to oblige his friends, made all inquiries and obtained every information respecting price and quality. Like all clever men, he was fond of good living, and was not at all a bad judge of the good things of this life. It was during the time that he officiated at Balaklava, that the church, which once had the appearance of a barn, was changed into a handsome religious edifice. Sebastopol had fallen, and, as a trophy, one of the bells of the Greek church ornamented his building, and called the faithful to their duty as regularly as the peal of any parish church. He was, in fact, the perfection of the aumônier du régiment; but, as in the case of all great geniuses, now and then, success was followed by failure, and victory by defeat—which the following will prove.
The day for the excursion had been fixed, postponed, and was again decided upon. For this change of plan I cannot account; no doubt it was owing to some unavoidable cause. At length the day was finally settled; there was to be no more postponing—off we must go. Our vessel was called the Alar, and she belonged to Mr. Crockford. As she was very small and short of accommodation, she was soon filled above and below. The evening before we were to start, the news of a great event for the following day was published in General Orders. It was to the effect that General Lüders would honour General Codrington with his presence at a grand review. This favour was not so highly appreciated by the nautical tourists as by their gallant Commander-in-chief, as at that time it materially interfered with their anticipated excursion. At all events, a serious discussion took place as to whether the excursion would or would not be postponed on that account. The answer “would not!” resounded in the camp from regiment to regiment, like a mot d’ordre, and the final order to all was, not to be on board a minute after eight o’clock; but the Alar, by way of punctuality, started at half-past seven. I sent two of my cooks to the vessel, but they never saw anything of the boat. A few minutes before eight o’clock, the Rev. Mr. Parker, myself, and others, got into a Maltese boat to join the steamer; instead of which, the steamer joined us. Not thanking either the Alar nor her captain for their trouble in coming to us instead of allowing us to go to them, the reverend gentleman and three more bravely boarded her, and in so doing kicked our bark away, and left us, in consequence of the swell caused by the motion of the paddle-wheels, very unsafely dancing an entirely new hornpipe in the harbour of Balaklava. At last, by the assistance of a large wave which nearly capsized us all, I managed to get hold of the man-rope by one hand; this happened to be the left one, so I could not raise myself on board, and there I was left hanging over the infuriated waves, the vessel all the while increasing her speed. As a precaution in walking through the wet fields, I had put on my India-rubber boots, which dipping in the water, soon became as slippery as a second-hand leech which will not take or bite at anything. The confusion on board the vessel, already a wreck, having been just dismasted in a serious collision with a larger steamer, prevented the people on board from perceiving my perilous position. My strength was rapidly becoming exhausted, and I must in a second or two have fallen into the water, when a reverend gentleman, whose name I regret to say I cannot recall, saw the imminent danger in which I was placed, and rescued me. Thanks to his assistance, I managed to lay hold of another rope with my right hand. I fancied I could travel miles in that position, it appeared to be so safe. Other assistance arrived, and a few minutes after I was hauled upon deck, scrambling amongst the wreck and loose ropes. A friendly voice addressed me with, “Hallo, Soyer! you are behind time.”
I replied, “I should have preferred being later still, and not have come at all.”
When the incident was known on board, it caused much merriment among our fellow-adventurers. As we were going on pleasure, all were allowed to laugh at the various adventures, as well as misadventures, of the party so I laughed, and all laughed, soon afterwards, and very heartily. We were no sooner out of the harbour, than the good ship Alar, which had not received her proper quantum of breakfast or ballast in her wooden or iron stomach, began her hanky-panky rolling tricks, which never ceased from the time we started till our return. Breakfast was ready and upon the table; but, for some unaccountable reason, no one appeared ready for breakfast. As we were out upon a pleasure excursion, each person was at liberty to enjoy himself in his own way. Some did this by remaining upon deck, others by looking overboard, &c., till at length the generous sun, taking pity upon us, threw out his beams and guided us round the beautiful rocky coast of the Balaklava and Lukan shores. A few glasses of champagne were circulated, healths were pledged, and everything got cheerful and lively; and the joy had even extended to some of the ladies on board.
Indeed, reader, I have not yet had time to introduce our fair companions to your notice; but I will do so shortly. Some of them actually went so far as to ask me what I thought was good for dinner. “Upon my word,” said I to my fair interlocutor, “I do not know what will be good, madam, but I’ll tell you what will be bad. Look behind you at that black cloud which seems to follow us so closely: I have no doubt that is a squall coming, which will soon spoil our bill of fare as well as our appetites.”
In about half-an-hour we came in sight of the beautiful Palace of Lukan, belonging to Prince Woronzoff. A short time before, we had anticipated landing and being able to dine in the gardens. This was rendered impossible, as the weather had assumed a very tempestuous aspect, and bore every appearance of a violent storm. Many began to think of a second wreck, and quite lost the idea of dining. The steamer was put about in a very unsociable gale of wind, which, thank God, dropped shortly after, and allowed us, after several attempts, to return safely to our harbour. This, considering the state the Alar was in after the accident she had met with, she ought not to have left, especially upon a pleasure-trip.
My friend, Mr. Frederick Crockford, who so kindly lent his boat, assisted me, and we set to work during our stormy return to prepare the dinner, which we had decided should be got ready, although almost every one on board was ill. So we began our fantastic and gymnastic culinary exertions by looking up the stores; and by dint of a wonderful amount of animal and physical perseverance, we managed to dish up two turkeys, a number of fowls, hams, roast lamb, tongues, roast beef, plum-puddings, salad, dessert, &c. &c., and cut bread enough for more than à discrétion. The reader will please to observe that it was by this time late in the afternoon, and the Alar sylph was rolling quite sufficiently to prevent any willing turkey from remaining upon the dish, when a tremendous wave came to its aid, and sent three parts of our luxuries rolling about the cabin-floor, breaking no end of plates, dishes, bottles, glasses, &c. Fortunately, our dinner was not lost, as we knew where it was—rolling to and fro on the wet cabin-floor, playing at the don’t-you-wish-you-may-get-me game. Mr. Crockford and myself had succeeded in making a semi-monster lobster salad, which for safety he had held on to all the time, almost at the peril of his valuable life, he being knocked about fearfully against the cabin-boards and bulkheads. At last we made the harbour. It was nearly dusk; and not being expected back so soon, nor even the next day, we were kept dancing for above an hour at the entrance. No doubt, this was done to sharpen our appetites.
A rumour was circulated that we should not be allowed to enter at all, the Alar being a merchant-vessel. This was our fate till about six o’clock, when signals were made for her to enter. We availed ourselves of this permission, and in twenty minutes the two large tables were set out à la marinière. Everybody was glad to partake of the most welcome repast ever bestowed upon a party after the enjoyment of so charming a day of pleasure. The salade mayonnaise was voted excellent. Champagne was gaily flowing in bowls, basins, teacups, goblets, &c. Healths were proposed; her Majesty’s first—next that of the Allied armies—then that of the Emperor of the French, Mr. Crockford’s and mine, in honour of the salade mayonnaise; and a vote of thanks was returned to the Rev. Mr. Parker, for the extremely pleasant day he had been the cause of our enjoying, especially the dinner in the harbour he had so well provided, which soon made us forget our nautical tribulations.
I have almost forgotten the members of the fair sex, whose health was proposed in the first place. They had been very ill all day. About eleven, all, except myself, had left the Alar in the full conviction of having enjoyed themselves very much indeed. Among the party, which would have been far too numerous, had not circumstances prevented many of those invited from making their appearance, were Commissary Drake, lady and daughter; Mr. and Mrs. Burnett. Lady Seymour and friend, who were to accompany the party, did not come. This is the sum-total of the ladies present, which for the Crimea was a very fair array of the beau sexe. As it was impossible for me to return to camp that evening, the captain and Mr. Crockford offered me a bed on board. I of course jumped at the offer. About one o’clock we were drinking a parting glass, when a boat was heard approaching the vessel, and a voice called out—