“Adam he said: 'You gum dasted beast of the field, why did you do that?’
“The duck tost its head contemptible and sed: 'Cause he makes me tired, he is so disgustin clean, always takin a bath.’
“Adam said: 'Dont you ever take a bath your own self?’
“The duck it said: 'No, I dont, cause cleanity is only but jest a habit, and water is pizen.’
“That made Adam so mad that he flang the whole bucket of oil on the duck, which smelt awful and has been aquaticle ever since. It swims and dives and splashes all the life long day for to wash the oil off, but the water wont take hold.”
I said why didnt the ducks wash their selfs with soap, but Uncle Ned he shook his head real mournful and said: “No, no, I have suggested that reform to them many a time and oft, but the march of mind is mighty slow in this world and, so far, they wont do any thing only but just eat the soap.”
Ducks quack and the eagle he screams, and the high eany it laughfs when there isnt any thing funny, the cammel he snorts out of his nose and Franky, thats the baby, he gets soap in his eye and is like the battles roar! Frankys eyes is blue, but my sisters young mans is gray, and when she looks into hisn he looks into hern. And thats why I say how wondful are the works of Provdence!
One day when him and her was to the picture gally she seen one which she liked real well and she said: “Isnt that a duck of a paintin?”
Then he said: “Yes, indeed, I seen the other side of it. It is a canvas back.”
But Uncle Ned says if he couldn’t make better jokes than that he would write for the comicle papers and defy detecktion!