On the second Saturday thereafter, having been summoned by Big Jim Green, the negro constable, Venus and Diana, with their respective satellites, appeared before the Trial Justice at Adams Run station, where Diana, duly indicted, was charged in the comprehensive phraseology of the Criminal Code with such a string of offenses against the peace and dignity of the State of South Carolina and the proper person of Venus Chisolm that her ears tingled and her eyes popped with amazement.
“Guilty or not guilty?”
“Uh yent know wuh you call so, Jedge, but uh nebbuh do none uh dem t’ing wuh da’ papuh call dem name. Ef Jedus yeddy me, uh nebbuh do uh Gawd’ t’ing but cut da’ ’ooman, en’ uh nebbuh hab uh chance fuh cut’um good, ’cause ’e hab ’e frock tie’up ’roun’ ’e wais’, en’ w’en uh cut at ’e hanch en’ de rice hook ketch ’e frock weh ’e roll’up behine’um, dat sabe de ’ooman’ meat, en’ uh only able fuh ’cratch ’e skin, but uh ’cratch’um ’nuf fuh mek’um holluh same lukkuh hog’ holluh w’en oonuh cut dem yez fuh maa’k’um, en’ alldo’ uh yent puhzac’ly cut de ’ooman, uh try fuh cut’um, but uh cut ’e frock en’ uh only able fuh ’cratch’um, en’ ef uh yiz bin cut’um, duh Scipio mek’ me fuh do’um, ’cause him come duh ricefiel’ wid da’ bluegum mout’ uh him’own full’uh pizen talk fuh bex me nuh Benus, en’ uh always yeddy suh ef uh bluegum nigguh bite you ’e gwine pizen you same lukkuh moccasin, en’ same fashi’n de talk wuh come out da’ nigguh’ jaw pizen alltwo uh we en’ mek we fuh fight, but, Jedge, uh nebbuh cut Benus lukkuh da’ papuh say, ’cause ef uh had’uh cut’um fuh true, true! da’ ’ooman would’uh haffuh stan’up ’puntop’uh ’e two foot fuh t’ree week!”
“Received as information,” observed the magistrate, and he called Venus, who came up smiling. “You have heard Diana’s story. What have you to say?”
“Uh yeddy’um, suh. But ’e cut me.”
“Where did she cut you?”
“Suh?”
“Where did she cut you?”
“’E cut me een Mas’ Edwu’d’ ricefiel’, suh.”