So he set himself to win what it was evident he could not command, and, Denasia’s womanly instincts being stronger than her artistic instincts, the husband conquered. The sweet words and kisses, the frank acknowledgment of his faults, the declaration that his whole future hung now on her support and interest in his American scheme, moved Denasia to concede where she felt sure she ought to have refused. But when a man finds all other arguments fail with a woman, he has only to throw himself 216 upon her unselfishness. To prove it, she will ruin her own life. Denasia was sure she was going a wrong road, but then Roland asked her to take it for his sake, and to show her love for him she offered up her own hopes and desires, and offered them with smiles and kind words and an affected belief that the change might be as good for her reputation as for her husband’s. She did indeed––as good women do a kindness––surrender herself entirely, and pretended that the surrender was her own desire and her husband’s complaisance a thing he deserved praise for.
However, Roland’s enthusiasms were undoubtedly partly contagious. Even Denasia, who had so often been deceived, was partly under their influence. His words had caught something of the vastness of the land of his hopes, and he talked so ambitiously and with so much certainty that the untravelled woman caught his fever once more. Then she also suffered the idea of America to fascinate her, and she permitted Roland to bring his new friends to see her, for she desired to be entirely possessed by the idea which was now to be the ruling motive of their lives. It was decided that they should sail about the middle of June. “We shall then have time to become familiar with the country, and we need not be in a hurry to decide about engagements. Hurry is such a mistake,” said Roland with oracular wisdom. And Denasia hoped and smiled, and then turned away to hide the sudden frown and sigh. For the heart is difficult to deceive, and Denasia’s heart warned her morning, noon, and night. But to what 217 purpose? Who heeds the warning from their higher selves? Though one rose from the dead to point out a fatal mistake, how many would heed the messenger? For when love says, “This is the way,” wisdom, fate, death itself may speak in vain.
About a week before the voyage, Roland said one night: “I think now, Denasia, that we have everything packed, I shall run down to St. Penfer and see my sister. I may never come back from America. Indeed, I do not think I shall ever want to come back, and I really ought to bid Elizabeth good-bye. She will doubtless also remember me in money matters, and in a strange country money is always a good friend. Is it not, dear? What do you think, Denasia?”
“I have been thinking a great deal of St. Penfer. My heart is like to break when I think of it. I do want to see my father and mother so much.”
“You would only get a heart-break, my love. They would have no end of reproaches for you. I shall never forget your mother. Her temper was awful!”
“You must have said something awful to aggravate her, Roland. Mother has a quick temper, but it is also noble and generous. I do want to see her. I must see her once more. Let us go together.”
“To St. Penfer? What a foolish idea! You would only give yourself a wretched memory to carry through your whole life.”
“Never mind! I want to go to St. Penfer.”
“How can you? I cannot take you to Burrell Court, Denasia.”