Odeon managed a grin. He didn't mean it all the way, but Jim's response did deserve something. "At this point, I'm feeling like nothing can go right, and I don't know what to do about it. I've got to work something out, so you might as well give me the professional version."
"Okay. In that case, I'm going to give you one more out. Lucius told me something that makes me want—need, under our present circumstances—to get you into the Empire and a job that'll regularly get you into dangerously interesting situations."
"I'm Strike Force, Jim, even though I was taken off active duty four months ago because I'm Joanie's heir. Danger's normal for us; it's only by God's grace I survived my first year, much less made it to age thirty-seven. And right now, I've got to admit I wouldn't exert a lot of effort to avoid getting killed. What job are you talking about?"
"Let me get to it more gradually, okay?"
"Okay, if that's your professional opinion."
Medart chuckled. "It is—and that answer gives me a lot of hope. Besides feeling betrayed, I'd bet that being relieved of active duty, and now having Keith take over your work with Joan, have you feeling useless as well. Am I right?"
Odeon nodded, reluctantly. "I've been trying to avoid thinking about that, but … yes, you're right. With Keith the Protector now, he probably won't be helping her the way I did—she probably won't need a helper any more, if he gives her the gifts the Herald was promised—and I didn't really like the work, but it was the only productive thing I was doing. Betrayal, uselessness—and I'm damn close to losing all my faith."
Which sounded like it was tearing him apart, Medart thought. A lot of people, even a few Rangers, needed a religious faith to feel complete; it wouldn't be a violation of the separation doctrine to try and help him regain his. "Don't give up till you read the Traditional church's Bible and teachings, Mike. They might be just what you need."
"I hope so." Odeon hesitated, then decided to go on; as a police officer, he knew that having all the facts was essential to reaching a good decision, and he wanted the best Medart could manage. "The night I was Sealed to the Protector—Joanie then, of course—Jeshua appeared to me in a vision. One of the things he told me was that I'd be tested by pain and loss great enough I'd be seriously tempted to reject him. I thought earlier that Shayan torturing me was that, but I was wrong. This is, and I hate it. It's a horrible feeling."
"I can tell," Medart said sympathetically. "Hang on; let me have that material brought down right away instead of waiting till morning." He touched his throat, gave the necessary orders. "Okay, they'll be here in half an hour or so. Unfortunately, we don't have any Traditional Catholics aboard, or I'd have asked one to come down and talk to you."