"Gran'ma Mullins is a good deal upset," said Susan; "she don't like the notion of young Doctor Brown's bringin' so much typhoid and diphtheria into town just as Hiram 's goin' to get married a tall. She says she 's got enough to worry over about Hiram without that. She says she 's feelin' worse over him every day. She can't talk about it without chokin'. She says she 's got his rattle and his first sock pinned up by the clock, so every time she looks up at the time she can see 'em 'n' cry again. She says it ain't in reason as Lucy 'll ever understand Hiram. She says Hiram 's a very singular disposition, but if you always ask him to do what you don't want done 'n' to never do what 's got to be done right off he 's one of the handiest men around the house as she ever see. She says he eats a lot of sugar 'n' you must n't notice it, 'cause he always says as he never does; and he most never goes to church, but you must n't tell him so, 'cause he says he goes regular, 'n' she says as he likes to keep molasses candy in his pockets 'n' under his pillow, 'n' heaven knows, likin' molasses candy ain't no crime, and yet she 's almost sure Lucy 's goin' to make his life miserable over it. She says her cup was full enough without no pint of diphtheria added, 'n' I d'n know as I ever see any one more downhearted. Mrs. Macy 'n' me stayed and shook our heads with her for a while 'n' then we went on t Mrs. Allen's to look at Polly's weddin' things. Every one in town is goin' to look at Polly's weddin' things, 'n' you 'd really suppose as the deacon was any one in the world but the deacon to see how they 've fixed Polly up to marry him. Four of everythin' 'n' six o' some. Only not a apron in the whole,—the deacon would n't have it. He said right out as he wa'n't marryin' Polly to work her to skin 'n' bone, and he knows how he wants his house kept 'n' his cookin' done, so he 'll just keep on keepin' 'n' cookin' as usual. He 's fixed up a good deal; the canary bird 's got a brass hook after all these years o' wooden-peggin', 'n' he 's bought one o' them new style doormats made out o' wire with 'Welcome P. W.' let into it in green marbles. 'P. W.' stands for 'Polly White,' 'n' Mr. Kimball told Mr. Macy they had a awful time over sticking the marbles in 'n' a awful time gettin' the letters to suit. The deacon was for 'P. W.' all along 'n' Polly was for the deacon, but Mrs. Allen was for Polly's name, because Polly ain't married yet, 'n' they got P. A. stuck in afore any one knowed how it'd look, 'n' then they tried to patch it up with a 'W' added 'n' that seemed like it was a new way to say to be sure 'n' wipe your feet. Mr. Kimball told Mrs. Macy he nigh to died laughin', 'n' he did n't mind how he broke his nails pickin' marbles in 'n' out when he could have so much fun. So they settled for 'P. W.,' 'n' Mrs. Macy 's more than a little bitter over it all, for she says the deacon 'll soon come to his senses 'n' then it'll be too late to get that 'P. W.' off of his door-mat again. But the deacon ain't carin'. He's friskin' around like a colt, 'n' they say he 's got two new suits of clothes 'n' a new hat for the goin' away. He was always that way though—I recolleck Mr. Kimball's sayin' when Mrs. White died that the deacon had been dyein' his hair 'n' bein' patient for over fifteen years.
"Well—about them weddin' things of Polly's!—Mrs. Allen took me upstairs 'n' I saw 'em all. The weddin' veil is looped along the lamberquin with a glove pinned to each curtain, the dress hangs on a frame between against the window shade, 'n' the under things is folded on a table at one side with the stockin's tied together in a true lovers'-knot. I must say they 've done it all real tasty, with the deacon's picture in the middle leanin' up against her shoes. It 's a open question about the shoes still, 'cause if Polly wears any shoes a tall it only makes her that much more higher than the deacon, but Mrs. Allen says, seein' as it 's as it is, she hopes Polly 'll only think o' how the higher her heels is the more room it 'll give her train to spread. It 's a very handsome train 'n' they 've measured so 's it 'll make the next set o' parlor curtains at the Whites'.
"I declare, Mrs. Lathrop, I can't tell you how all these weddin's 'n' talkin's do blue me up! To see every one spendin' money 'n' me without any even to save. Mr. Dill asked me yesterday if I did n't want to take Gran'ma Mullins to board for the honeymoon, an' I suppose I could maybe do it, but oh my! I can't say as I take to that idea much. I 'm fond o' Gran'ma Mullins, but these days Hiram is nothin' but a bottomless pit when she gets at him, 'n' a honeymoon is a long time to hear one person talk about one person. I can 't say as I ever had anythin' again Hiram except that time 't he did n't catch Jathrop to lynch him, but all the same I ain't over fond o' any one as goes around with their mouth half-open the year through. Mr. Kimball said once as Hiram Mullins was the best design for a penny bank as he ever saw, 'n' Polly Allen says she 's more 'n sorry for Lucy, 'cause no matter how hard Lucy was to try, Polly says it stands to reason as she could n't get more 'n half a kiss at once. Mrs. Allen giggled, 'n' we all did, too, 'cause the deacon carries his mouth so tight shut that it's a question if Polly ever gets a kiss a tall.
"Mrs. Brown says Doctor Brown is gettin' surer 'n' surer about the crick. He 's been paintin' the cat with asthma 'n' then washin' him in crick water, 'n' Mrs. Brown says he wa'n't dead up to the time he run away anyhow."
"That big—" queried Mrs. Lathrop.
"Yes, with the yellow eyes. He 's been gone a week, but they don't care. Mrs. Brown says that cat was so everlastin'ly around that he made her feel like she was married again, 'n' she was glad to have him light out. She says he was so like a man it was awful,—wantin' to sit by the fire 'n' think till you was dyin' to empty the tea-kettle over his head, 'n' forever placidly yawnin' when you was turned a hundred ends at once. Mrs. Brown says Amelia 's goin' to give a wash-cloth shower for Polly and Lucy day after to-morrow. She says young Doctor Brown says if he comes out on top about that crick-cure for asthma Amelia can do anythin' she pleases. He says this town 'll be a real cure then, 'n' we 'll see no end of money flow into us,—she says he says we can all take boarders at fancy prices 'n' serve 'em to the crick at a penny a glass. I don't know but what I might take a few quiet boarders myself that way. They 'd be quiet because they could n't be lively, 'n' the asthma 'd choke 'em to where they could n't eat much."
"I—" said Mrs. Lathrop.
"I could have 'Liza Em'ly to help me, I presume. I could advertise 'n' when they answered I could go in town 'n' look at them and take my pick. I 'd want to be sure as they were quiet, 'n' I 'd want to be sure as they were sick—I would n't take no chances at havin' one o' these merry-go-round summer families land on me, I know. Like as not there 'd be a boy, 'n' you know yourself, Mrs. Lathrop, that while a boy may perhaps accidentally happen to be a comfort he 's very much more likely just to be a boy."
"Yes," said Mrs. Lathrop—"I—"
"Yes, o' course," said Susan, "'n' look where he come out! If Jathrop had been a girl how different everything would have been for him—not to speak o' the rest of us. You can't deny that, Mrs. Lathrop, 'n' you can't deny either as Jathrop would have been better off himself if he 'd been any other thing as God ever made."