"What did—" began Mrs. Lathrop.
"There was n't no other way to get 'em both there—that's why," said Susan; "there was them as went on the cars, but that was n't no great success, for they was so late that Rufus had his lid all on afore they got there, so they really had very little for their money. 'N' besides, if we 'd all gone on the cars, how was we to get to the grave? Rufus was well this side o' Meadville, 'n' the cemetery's some further this way, 'n' whatever your views may be I hope you don't mind my sayin' right out as other folks' views is always more sensible. You can't be expected to know much, Mrs. Lathrop, with your few church privileges 'n' your parlor too small for the sewin' society; but if you was less inclined to talk 'n' more inclined to listen to me I may in confidence remark as you might learn about the funeral—even if you never learned nothin' else in this world."
Mrs. Lathrop was again silent forthwith.
"Drivin' over we all talked about Rufus. We had really a very pleasant ride, for we was all disposed to view him kindly goin' over. Mrs. Macy told over again what a superior baby he was, 'n' Gran'ma Mullins told over again what a superior boy he was, 'n' Mrs. Macy said as Mrs. Kitts said as he was the talk o' the town when he was twenty-one. Gran'ma Mullins did n't remember much about him then, 'cause she got married along about that time, 'n' she 's always said that them who gets married don't need nothin' else to do for one while; but Mrs. Macy said Rufus was one o' the most superior young men as Mrs. Kitts ever see. She said as old Mr. Tilley took him right into the heart 'n' soul o' his drug-store jus' because his mother was his cousin, 'n' even then the general feelin' was as he was way above the business. Mrs. Macy said as Mrs. Kitts said she 'd never forget goin' in one day for some salts 'n' finding Rufus all alone. Why, she said she never had known he was so head 'n' shoulders above other people! She says she 's told the story a million times 'n' it 's still fresh in her mind. She said she asked for simple salts, 'n' he begun right off about a comet. She felt awful uncomfortable to have to say as she had n't seen no comet, 'n' then it turned out no wonder, 'cause you could only see it from China an' Maddygasgar. She said she was awful interested, 'n' he was too, 'n' in the end he was so interested that he found he had n't poured out o' the salts bottle a tall. It was only just a chance as he remembered as it was salts she wanted, 'n' she said he was so nice about it, went under the counter to find a cork to fit, 'n' told her all about how they get gumarabic while he was under there, 'n' she was so deep in the subjeck that she never noticed, 'n' he stuck a poison label on, 'n' they both laughed over that fit to kill themselves. My goodness, Mrs. Macy said, but Mrs. Kitts said as he was a taking young man. In the end he wrote the name in Latin across the skull 'n' cross-bones, 'n' she only had to always remember as 'Sally Simplex' meant 'simple salts' from then on.
"She went on to say as the biggest thing Rufus ever done long about then was to down their minister in a open conversation one night callin' at Deacon Grummel's. She told all about it, 'n' seems as there was some talk afterwards about gettin' up a subscription to send him to college, only it never come to nothin' 'cause no one wanted to subscribe. Seems the minister was Luther Law, him as moved to Chicago afterwards 'n' got burnt up or out—I forget which—in the fire. Seems he was to Deacon Grummel's one night, 'n' him 'n' Rufus got to discussin' what we all come from. Mrs. Macy says Mrs. Grummel said she never hear the like. She 'n' her husband was jus' all of a tremble. She said afterwards that if it 'd of been any other minister than Luther Law, Rufus would have had him sure. She said it was just like a lecture hall to hear, upon her honor. The minister begun by startin' out for our all comin' from Adam 'n' Eve, but Rufus come out flat for our bein' from monkeys. Well, Mrs. Grummel said she 'n' her husband could n't do no more than feel their hearts beat at that. Rufus jus' argued 'n' kep' on arguin' till he made the minister admit as there was n't nothin' absolute agin' monkeys, 'n' then—if that young man did n't go him one better 'n' say as he believed in tadpoles himself. Luther Law was flat agin' tadpoles, but Rufus never let up till he got him to admit that if the Lord could make a man out of a monkey He could make him out of a tadpole, too. 'N' then, when he'd got him so far, what do you think, Mrs. Lathrop,—what do you think!—Mrs. Macy said as Mrs. Kitts said as Mrs. Grummel said if that young man did n't look right square into Luther's face 'n' say as to his order o' thinkin' it wasn't what we'd come from as mattered so much as what we'd develop into next. 'That's what I want to know,' he said to Luther Law, runnin' his hand into himself in that way as was so fashionable along 'bout then, 'that's what I want to know, 'n' I can't find no one as has a addykit answer for me.'
"Well, Mrs. Macy said Mrs. Kitts said as up to her deathbed day Mrs. Grummel always said as that was the minute o' her life. She said facin' cannon would n't be nothin' to the way she 'n' the deacon felt over seein' the minister asked a thing like that right on top o' their own tea! But, lor, you never could stick Luther Law. A minister would n't be able to be able to be a minister if little things like questions you can't answer could run him aground. He jus' waited a minute 'n' then he looked slow 'n' sad, an' lifted up his hand so, 'n' pointed so, an' said, 'Young man, how can you ask such a question, with the starry heaven right on top of your head?'
"Well! Mrs. Grummel said it was like a flash o' thunder splittin' clean through the air. She said her husband never quit saying to his dying day as that was the smartest thing as Luther Law ever said, considerin' how little time he had to think, 'n' it was the only thing in the wide world as he could of said, too. She said she told that story all over town, 'n' no one could ever decide which was the smartest, Rufus or Luther Law; 'cause even if Luther Law did find a way out, it was such a astonishin' thing as he did that Rufus got a sight o' credit out of comin' as nigh to stickin' him as he did. A good many people begun to say then as he was too superior for a small town;—old Dr. Lumb said as to his order o' thinkin' he 'd ought to move near to some place where he'd have professors to talk to.
"Mrs. Macy said Mrs. Kitts give her to understand, though, as there was a 'nother side to Rufus even then, 'n' it begun to crop out mighty young, too. Mrs. Kitts said she would n't mention it only in confidence, but Mr. Tilley, of the drug-store where Rufus was, told her as he'd be only too glad to see Rufus move anywhere, whether it had professors to talk to or not. Mr. Tilley said his ideas was far too advanced for a small town. Mr. Tilley said he could n't find the easiest things after Rufus had got 'em labelled in Latin, 'n' he said it wasn't practical to classify no drug-store without a rollin' step-ladder anyhow. Then there came up the Kelly cat, 'n' on account of the Kellys havin' money the Kelly cat come nigh to endin' Rufus. I never hear about the Kelly cat afore, but seems as the Kelly cat was ailin' 'n' the Kellys took it to Rufus for catnip, 'n' Rufus got to discoursin' with Bessy on how if you're born under Venus with Mars gettin' up you're bound to marry whoever you love, 'n' he clean forgot what ailed the cat 'n' tried to give her ipecac as if she was croupy instead o' bein' droopy. The cat knowed ipecac even if Rufus did n't, 'n' she bounced out from between him 'n' Bessy 'n' bounced into the winder 'n' busted the big bottle full o' green. Rufus said it was a fit, 'n' he got a hair-oil bottle as gives you a nickel nose of your own for nothin', 'n' he put the nose on the ipecac 'n' got the whole down the cat so far that she come nigh to swallowin' the nose. Mrs. Macy said Mrs. Kelly never felt to forgive Rufus, 'n' it set her deader 'n' ever agin' him, but, lor, Bessy was too head over heels in love to care about cats or ipecac. She was as sure Rufus was superior as any one could be, 'n' every one knowed what was up as well as she 'n' Rufus did. Mrs. Macy said as every one said as a superior young man must marry money or he could n't in reason stay superior long, 'n' Rufus was dead set on stayin' superior, so they was married the next spring 'n' moved to the city, 'n' they did n't come back till it was plain as Mr. Kelly 'd have to support 'em or let Bessy starve on Rufus's superiority."
Susan paused abruptly and sighed. Mrs. Lathrop said never a word. Presently the discourse flowed on again.
"Well, there was n't really no wish to say nothin' but good of Rufus, but it is a long drive to Meadville an' we had to talk, 'n' you know as well as I do, Mrs. Lathrop, as it's nigh to impossible to talk long of people if you 're only to say good of 'em. Rufus was there 'n' dead to talk about, 'n' while we naturally wished him well, still we was pretty tired before we got through drivin' sixteen miles to bury him. Gran'ma Mullins said finally as he was certainly a very superior man, but she knowed from her niece Hannah as he was trying to live with. She said Hannah lived with 'em for five years 'n' looked after the children, 'n cheered Bessy up when she was nigh to wore out with bein' married to Rufus. Hannah never had no use for Rufus Timmans herself,—she was awful fond o' Bessy 'n' the boys, but she drawed the line at Rufus, 'n' Gran'ma Mullins says she never minced matters neither. Gran'ma Mullins says as Hannah used to walk right in on Rufus 'n' let fly whenever she felt as the salvation of her soul called on her to speak or bu'st. She said Hannah said what she could n't stand was the way the general public seemed to coincide with Rufus's opinion of himself. Hannah used to say as the general run o' folks did n't have to live with Rufus Timmans an' she did, 'n' she furthermore used to say if the general run o' folks had had to live with Rufus Timmans they would n't o' viewed him from no fancy standpoint no more 'n' she did herself. Hannah used to say as day in 'n' day out was a terrible lettin' in o' light on dark spots, 'n' for her part she had n't got no use for a man as had the whole o' the inside o' the earth by heart 'n' was n't one earthly bit o' good on the outside of it. Hannah said as all she could say was as she wisht as some o' them as admired his superior understandin' could just be in her place one while. Gran'ma Mullins said as there was one time as Hannah never got over, 'n' that was the cistern, she said as Hannah always got mad whenever she told it, 'n' she told it so often, her face stayed always red in the end, jus' from tellin' that story so often.