CONTENTS
| INTRODUCTION, | [iii] |
ENTRANCE INTO SOCIETY: | |
General Observations—Case of the Bashful Young Man—Enter Society Early—Avoid Forwardness and Romping—Snobs—Fops—Bores—The Secret of Making Yourself at Ease—Good-Nature everything, | [7] |
GENERAL OBSERVANCES FOR VISITS, ETC.: | |
The several Kinds of Visits—Styles of Dress appropriate—Proper Time to Call—Make a brief Stay—Visits to the Newly-Married—Of Condolence—After a Party—on New Year's day, etc., | [13] |
SPECIAL OBSERVANCES FOR ALL OCCASIONS: | |
Directions for all to Learn by Heart, in Regard to Dress, Demeanor, Conversation, etc., etc., | [16] |
THE FORMULA OF INTRODUCTIONS: | |
How to "Introduce"—General Forms to be Observed—When Introductions are Proper—Promiscuous Introductions Improper, | [20] |
ON DRESS AND ORNAMENTS: | |
Good Dress highly Proper and Necessary—The kind of Garments proper for Various Occasions—Jewelry and "Flash" Dressing vulgar—When Jewelry is in Good Taste—Special advice to Females upon Their Dress—Flowers, Jewels, Feathers, Arrangement of Hair, etc., etc., | [21] |
ON CLEANLINESS AND FASTIDIOUSNESS: | |
The Hands, Nails, Mouth, Teeth, etc., etc.—Bathe Frequently for Purity of Complexion—Tobacco and Smell of Smoke Offensive and Forbidden in the House or in the Presence of Ladies—"Broken" garments—Neatness inseparable from True Gentility, | [24] |
CONVERSATION AND PERSONAL ADDRESS: | |
The Various Talkers—How to Talk and When—The kind of Subjects proper to Introduce—Pedantry out of Place—Impropriety of Personalities—Good Talking and Good Manners always go Together, | [25] |
WRITING OF LETTERS, ETC.: | |
How to Address, and kind of Paper to Use—Seals, Franks, Superscriptions, etc.—The Forms generally Used—On Style—The Proprieties of Language—Praise and Flattery out of Place—Models not always Available—Letters to Friends—A "Dime Letter Writer" in Press, | [27] |
BALLS, EVENING-PARTIES, RECEPTIONS, ETC.: | |
Whole Etiquette and Observances of these Occasions, with Special Remarks to both Sexes upon Deportment, Proprieties, etc.—A Chapter for all Young Persons to Read, | [31] |
THE CARD AND CHESS TABLE, ETC.: | |
Etiquette of Sociable Games—Chess and its Proprieties—Cheerfulness a Necessary Companion for all Players, | [38] |
ENTERTAINMENTS, DINNER-PARTIES, ETC.: | |
The whole Etiquette of such Occasions, including General and Special Directions, | [40] |
ETIQUETTE OF THE STREET: | |
Explicit Directions for Behavior on the Street—A True Gentleman known by his Demeanor—How to Treat Ladies, | [43] |
THE POLITENESS OF BUSINESS: | |
How Proper Politeness is, in Employees and Employers—Rules which should Invariably Mark their Deportment, | [46] |
ADVICE TO THE WORKING-MAN: | |
Politeness Essential to all—Boorishness Intolerable and Injurious—The true Relation between the various Workers in Society, | [47] |
LOVE, COURTSHIP, AND MARRIAGE: | |
A Chapter by an Eminent Author—The Language of True Love and its Expression—The True Relations of the Sexes—Coquetry and Flirting a Mark of Baseness—Courtship—Its Modes of Procedure and its Proper Manifestation—Its Attendant Responsibilities—Marriage—The Solemn Character of the Occasion—Its Forms of Procedure, and Rites of the Ceremony—After-Marriage Customs and Observances, | [48] |
RESPECT FOR RELIGION AND OLD AGE: | |
Remarks Designed for the Young of both Sexes, and Advice they will not Fail to Profit by, | [53] |
SPECIAL WORD, FOR LADIES ONLY: | |
The Necessities of Particular Styles of Dress—Velvets, Muslins, Complexion, etc.—A fair Face should be Always in Smiles, | [55] |
CONFIDENTIAL ADVICE TO YOUNG MEN: | |
The Great, Invariable Law of Compensations—The True Principles of Conduct, the and grand Secret of Success, | [57] |
CULTIVATE A TASTE FOR THE BEAUTIFUL: | |
That "the Beautiful" is—Its great Utility in Modifying our Tastes and in Directing our Habits—Art, Music, Books, Female Companionship, all to be Cultivated Sedulously, | [59] |
ETIQUETTE OF HORSEBACK RIDING: | |
The Uses of this Noble Exercise—The Rules of the Road and the Proper Attentions to Offer—The Dress, etc., | [62] |
THE LAWS OF HOME ETIQUETTE: | |
A Chapter for Every One to Read and to Commit to Memory—How Homes are made Models of Happiness and Comfort—The Laws of Intercourse with Guests and with Members of the Family, | [64] |
CARDS OF INVITATION FOR ALL OCCASIONS: | |
The Formulas of Invitations, Cards of Address, Calling Cards, Wedding Cards, Letters of Introduction, etc., etc., | [70] |
BEADLE'S
DIME BOOK
OF
ETIQUETTE.
ENTRANCE INTO SOCIETY.
Has the moment arrived when you are called upon to cast aside your youthful associations and youthful irresponsibilities to take your place in society as a man or woman? It is a most important moment—one which deserves the consideration of a thoughtful study; for, upon a proper knowledge of what belongs to true manhood, true womanhood, does much of your after-life success depend. If you are ignorant of the laws of politeness, of the rules and observances of true sociality, of the means necessary to render yourself an agreeable companion and a useful member of the social circle, you begin life at immense disadvantage, and will never cease to regret that ignorance. It is such an easy matter to become familiar with the usages and proprieties of social life that ignorance is inexcusable; and when we see men of sense and sagacity behaving, in an assembly, at a party, at the dinner-table, at the card-table, like half-tutored savages,—rude, awkward, uncivil, a source of annoyance to their friends, we feel a degree of indignation rather than of pity, since it is so easy to learn how to behave, that there really is no good excuse for boorishness and awkward deportment.
To illustrate, let us narrate the case of our young friend Falconbridge, whose entree into society afforded a subject of laughter and comment for weeks after the incidents which he has had the courage to place before us as a warning. He tells his story thus:
"I pulled the bell with a most nervous twitch; I 'walked in' with fear and misgivings; in the parlor not only sat Miss Jones, but her two cousins, the old lady, a maiden aunt, and some four or five of the junior branches of the Jones family. I got through, though it was fearful work. I set my hat on the center-table, and it fell off; I picked it up, and in doing so, hit my nose against a pile of gilt-edged literature, and down it came pell-mell; but the children came to my rescue, and I finally found myself armed by a lady each side—the cousins! Imagine my feelings—Miss J. going in advance, en route, down the avenue to the portly residence of Misses Degrands. We entered the vestibule; I had not spoken a word all the way; the two pretty cousins and Miss J. doing a heap of conversation. In the hall the old negro servant made a grab at my hat, but I held on, and in triumph carried it into the parlor, where, in the midst of introductions, flaring of lamps, and waving and fluttering of silks and cashmeres, bowing, scraping, fuss and feathers, to all of which I was more or less deaf and blind, down upon a piano-stool in the corner I dropped my hat.