A SIGNIFICANT INTERPOLATION.
The most celebrated wits and bon vivants of the day graced the dinner table of Dr. Kitchener, and inter aliis George Colman, who was an especial favourite. His interpolation of a little monosyllable in a written admonition, which the Doctor caused to be placed on the mantlepiece of the dining parlour, will never be forgotten, and was the origin of such a drinking bout as was seldom permitted under his roof. The caution ran thus: "Come at seven, go at eleven." Colman briefly altered the sense of it; for, upon the Doctor's attention being directed to the card, he read, to his astonishment, "Come at seven, go it at eleven!" which the guests did, and the claret was punished accordingly.
THE SEAMAN-BISHOP.
Dr. Lyons, who was appointed to the Bishopric of Cork, Cloyne, and Ross, towards the end of the reign of Queen Elizabeth, held the See for twenty years, but only preached once—on the death of the Queen. His aversion to preaching is ascribed to the fact that he was not educated for the church. He was, indeed, captain of a ship, and distinguished himself so gallantly in several actions with the Spaniards, that, on his being introduced to the Queen, she told him that he should have the first vacancy that offered. The simple captain understood the Queen literally; and soon after, hearing of a vacancy in the See of Cork, he immediately set out for Court, and claimed the fulfilment of the royal promise. The Queen, astonished at the request, for a time remonstrated against the impropriety of it, and said that she could never think it a suitable office for him. It was, however, in vain; he pleaded the royal promise, and relied on it. The Queen then said she would take a few days to consider the matter; when, examining into his character, and finding that he was a sober, moral man, as well as an intrepid commander, she sent for him, and gave him the Bishopric, saying that she "hoped he would take as good care of the Church, as he had done of the State."
UNPREACHING PRELATES.
The appointment of bishops and other ecclesiastics to lay offices, and more especially to places in the Mint, during the reign of Edward VI., was severely censured from the pulpit by the intrepid and venerable Bishop Latimer. In his "Sermon of the Plough," he says, with equal humour and vigour: "But now for the fault of unpreaching prelates, methinks I could guess what might be said for excusing them. They are so troubled with lordly living, they be so placed in palaces, couched in courts, ruffling in their rents, dancing in their dominions, burdened with embassages, pampering of their paunches, like a monk that maketh his jubilee, munching in their mangers, and moiling in their gay manors and mansions, and so troubled with loitering in their lordships, that they cannot attend it. They are otherwise occupied, some in King's matters, some are ambassadors, some of the Privy Council, some to furnish the Court, some are lords of the Parliament, some are presidents, comptrollers of Mints. Well, well, is this their duty? Is this their office? Is this their calling? Should we have ministers of the Church to be comptrollers of Mints? Is this a meet office for a priest that hath the cure of souls? Is this his charge? I would here ask one question: I would fain know who comptrolleth the devil at home at his parish, while he comptrolleth the Mint? If the apostles might not leave the office of preaching to be deacons, shall one leave it for minting? I cannot tell you; but the saying is, that since priests have been minters, money hath been worse than it was before." In another part of this discourse the Bishop proceeds to ask, "Is there never a nobleman to be a Lord President, but it must be a prelate? Is there never a wise man in the realm to be a comptroller of the Mint? I speak it to your shame, I speak it to your shame. If there be never a wise man, make a water-bearer, a tinker, a cobbler, a slave, a page, the comptrollers of the Mint. Make a mean gentleman, a groom, a yeoman; make a poor beggar, Lord President. Thus I speak, not that I would have it so, but to your shame, if there be never a gentleman meet nor able to be Lord President. For why are not the noblemen and young gentlemen of England so brought up in knowledge of God and in learning, that they might be able to execute offices in the commonweal?"
CHARLES II. AND HIS CHAPLAIN.
Dr. Hickringal, who was one of King Charles the Second's chaplains, whenever he preached before his Majesty, was sure to tell him of his faults from the pulpit. One day his Majesty met the Doctor in the Mall, and said to him, "Doctor, what have I done to you that you are always quarrelling with me?" "I hope your Majesty is not angry with me," quoth the Doctor, "for telling the truth." "No, no," says the king; "but I would have us for the future be friends." "Well, well," quoth the Doctor, "I will make it up with your Majesty on these terms: as you mend I'll mend."