Deadly Adulteration and Slow Poisoning Unmasked / Disease and Death in the Pot and Bottle

by Anonymous

The perfumers, the keepers of the “emporiums and bazaars of fashion,” the manufacturers of the “best genuine bears’ grease,” of the “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of the “Kalydors”—of “Les Cosmetiques Royales”—of the “Red and White Olympian Dews,” and other prodigiously grand and etymological titles “breathing the spirit of patriotic rivalry,” have all exerted their respective wits in the art of economising expense and “saving a penny.” In fact the tooth-powders, the dentrifices, the ottars of roses, the musks, the cosmetics, the lotions, the balsams, the Hungary waters, the Eaus de Cologne, as well as all the other frenchified eaus, the milks and creams of roses, the pomades divines, the blooms, the pearl-waters, the lip-salves, the perfumes,—the Naples almond and beautifying soaps,—the cephalic, Macouba, and other-hard named snuffs, are all vile sophistications, and (to omit speaking of their injurious properties to the health and the skin,) contain but little of the ingredients of which the artists profess that they are made. On this subject I shall address myself especially to my fair readers: craving leave to premise, that it is strange that British ladies, to whom Nature has been so bountiful, should destroy their native charms and have recourse to the wretched substitutes of art, which are destructive of beauty, and produce real deformity.

As many ladies attempt to improve their complexions by the use of the pernicious cosmetics, which are continually and unblushingly advertised as beautifiers of the skin, most of which are either worthless or dangerous, (for if they have any effect, it is that of conveying mercury, lead, or bismuth into the system, and too frequently laying the foundation of diseases which are often dangerous, and sometimes fatal;) I cannot refrain from advising those “fair ones” who have been in the habit of using trash of so villainous a nature, that if they have any of it by them, to throw it away at once, and to be persuaded that the best cosmetics are exercise in the open air, an active attention to social and domestic duties, regular hours of repose at night, and cheerful hilarity and tranquility of mind, and that those cheap and wholesome remedies will not, as the author of “The Toilette Companion” well observes, fail to animate their countenances and beautify their complexions beyond the blooms and the balsams, the Grecian and the Egyptian Waters, the Kalydors and the Macassar Oils, the Gowland’s Lotions and the Pearl Powders, the Cosmetiques Royales, the Red and White Olympian Dews, the Essences, the Eaus, and the Pomades Divines, the Essences Apolloniennes or Tyrian, and the Tonic Wines, and all the other puffed and delusive nostrums, that knavery, cupidity, and effrontery, have ever palmed upon a credulous public, by which dull and lustreless eyes, sallow and shrivelled skins, lifeless and cloudy complexions, and impaired and ruined health, are infallibly super-induced: or those simple and easily purchased ingredients, with a strict attention to cleanliness, that is, well washing the skin every day, and drying it with a course towel,—or when the head, neck, or face perspire, rubbing it dry with a towel of the like description, will, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” says, more effectually beautify the complexion, preserve the skin pure, soft, and pervious, and consequently the health firm and unaffected, than all the frauds that have ever been contrived to cheat and deceive the unwary or the inexperienced. Cold water, however, should not be used when the skin is warm, nor very warm water when it is chilled. For as the author of that clever little work “The Toilette Companion, or The whole Art of Beauty and of Dressing,” says, “Many a beautiful face, neck, and arm, have been spoiled by not observing this caution.”

I have mentioned the dangerous consequences from the use of the repellent cosmetics and other quack nostrums puffed off in the newspapers; but, as example is more convincing than precept, I shall present my readers with a few cases of their lamentable results, which fell under the observation of the celebrated Dr. Darwin.

“Mrs. S. being much troubled with pimples, applied an alum poultice to her face, which was soon followed by a stroke of the palsy, and terminated in her death. Mrs. L. applied to her face for pimples a quack nostrum, supposed to be some preparation of lead. Soon after she was seized with epileptic fits, which ended in palsy and caused her death. Mr. Y. applied a preparation of lead to his nose to remove pimples, and it brought on palsy on one side of his face. Miss S. an elegant young lady, applied a cosmetic lotion to her face for small red pimples. This produced inflammation of the liver, which required repeated bleedings with purgatives to remove. As soon as the inflammation was subdued, the pimples re-appeared.” (Darwin’s Zoonomia.) Every person could enlarge this catalogue from the sphere of his own acquaintance.

I am willing to believe that I have (to use a legal phrase) made out a sufficient case to prove the inefficacy, nay the dangerous consequences of cosmetics, and the rest of the long list of et-ceteras for beautifying the skin. It will now be my duty to direct my attention to the other frauds and impositions practised under the titles of “hair strengtheners”—“hair beautifyers”—of “best genuine bears’ grease”—of “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of “Pommades Divines,”—and the remaining hair hoaxes and humbugs, played off as hair oils, Russia oils, and similar puffed nostrums, under pretty and taking titles, by Prince, Ross and Son, M’Alpine, and the rest of the bear’s grease and hair-oil men; and I shall feel a singular pleasure should I be the medium of saving any “lovely or loveable woman” from becoming the dupe of imposture and deception.

Amongst the various cosmetics recommended by the adventurer for the dressing room, it must be admitted that none seems more harmless than those which profess to give a fine curl to the hair. But to assert that any liquid will, of itself, give a permanent or temporary curl to the hair is fallacious; though it is true that the application of a weak soap lye, or a solution of caustic potash, will render the hair more susceptible of adopting the artificial curl given by putting it into papers. But then it must be recollected that the effect occasioned by soap lye or potash is only produced by a complete alteration of the organic structure of the hair, superinducing a slow but certain destruction of that beautiful ornament of the human head. This effect may not be immediately observed, either in youth or in advanced life; but it is certain and inevitable.

Equally destructive are the various liquid dyes so loudly boasted of, and extensively advertised, by quacks for colouring the hair; some of them, indeed, do produce the effect proposed, particularly the black dyes; but they are all injurious, especially the black, as their basis consists always of nitrate of silver, (that is, silver dissolved in nitric acid or aqua-fortis) or lunar caustic when in a dry state; but the operation is destructive of the hair, as must be evident to any one who has seen the effect of caustic on warts on the skin. It has been well said that if we wish to save our hair, we must first save our money, by abstaining from the whole list of those puffed and unprincipled recipes and nostrums that stare us in the face in every newspaper, and in almost every shop-window.

The folly of giving credence to any of the impudent and disgraceful impostures for the pretended power of certain ingredients to change the colour of the hair, must, as the author of The Toilette Companion observes, be evident to every person when he is told that the hair depends on a peculiar secretion, and that, when that secretion ceases, which it does from several causes, as grief, fright, ill health, great mental exertion, age, &c. the hair becomes grey: “for Nature, like a provident mother, when she feels the powers of life impaired or decaying, exerts all her energies to support and preserve the vital organs, and can no longer, from her limited means, supply the outposts and ornamental parts of the system as before, which therefore suffer and are sacrificed.”

Nor are the deceits of the base nostrum-mongers for making the hair grow and curl, or for making the bald pericranium of a nonagenarian vegetate in all the luxuriance of rejuvenization, the only frauds practised: equally destructive are the advertised depilatories, the general basis of which is yellow orpiment, a certain poison if taken inwardly. It is true that the Turks, with whom bald heads are in fashion, and also the Chinese, do use this as an unguent, to save the trouble of frequent shaving; but it should be recollected that those cosmetics which may be harmless on the head of a robust Janissary,—of a bashaw of three tails or a fat Mandarin, do not necessarily become fit adjuncts for the toilette of a “British fair,”—“the lovely daughters of Albion, Erin, or Scotia,” or even that of an “Herculean delicate,” a Lilliputian dandy, or a Bond-street exquisite.

Snuff-sniffers and tobacco-munchers and puffers, do ye know what the delectable ingredients which form part of the articles of your recreation, are? Have you never heard that snuff is often compounded of pulverised nut-shells, of the powder of old rotten wood, called powder post; that the colour is improved by ochre, and the appearance and feel modified by an addition of treacle or urine? And have you never been told that the pungency of snuff is increased by the agency of powdered glass or the muriate of ammonia? Tobacco smokers and “chawers,” have ye never been told that your favourite “quid” is often composed of black hellebore, corrosive sublimate, dried dock-leaves, and a variety of other innocent ingredients? Oh, dear! what a deal you have yet to learn before you “become wise as serpents!”