"Is she tall or short, slender or plump?"
The prospective bridegroom answered seriously:
"Well, sir, I'm free to say, that if I'd had the rollin' of her, I sure would have given her three or four more passes."
FRAUD
The hired man on a New England farm went on his first trip to the city. He returned wearing a scarf pin set with at least four carats bulk of radiance. The jewelry dazzled the rural belles, and excited the envy of the other young men. His employer bluntly asked if it was a real diamond.
"If it ain't," was the answer, "I was skun out o' half a dollar."
FRIENDSHIP
The kindly lady accosted the little boy on the beach, who stood with downcast head, and grinding his toes into the sand and looking very miserable and lonely indeed.
"Haven't you anybody to play with?" she inquired sympathetically.
The boy shook his head forlornly, as he explained: