"If I was in my daddy's barn," the youth explained huskily through a choking sob, "I'd go into the house mighty quick!"
HONEYMOON
The newly married pair were stopping in a hotel. The bride left the groom in their room while she went out on a brief shopping expedition. She returned in due time, and passed along the hotel corridor to the door, on which she tapped daintily.
"I'm back, honey—let me in," she murmured with wishful tenderness. But there was no answer vouchsafed to her plea. She knocked a little more firmly, and raised her voice somewhat to call again:
"Honey, honey—it's Susie! Let me in!"
Thereupon a very cold masculine voice sounded through the door:
"Madam, this is not a beehive; it's a bathroom!"
HONORABLE INTENTIONS
A certain man notorious for his slowness paid attention for two years to a young lady, without coming to the point. The girl's father thought it time for him to interfere. On the swain's next visit, the father interviewed him:
"Clinton, you've been settin' up with Nellie, an' takin' her to picnics, an' to church an' buggy-ridin', an' nothin's come of it. So, now, Clinton, I ask you, as man to man, what be your intentions?"