* * *
When his daughter returned from the girls' college, the farmer regarded her critically, and then demanded:
"Ain't you a lot fatter than you was?"
"Yes, dad," the girl admitted. "I weigh one hundred and forty pounds stripped for 'gym.'"
The father stared for a moment in horrified amazement, then shouted:
"Who in thunder is Jim?"
* * *
On an occasion when a distinguished critic was to deliver a lecture on the poet Keats in a small town, the president of the local literary society was prevented by illness from introducing the speaker, and the mayor, who was more popular than learned, was asked to officiate. The amiable gentleman introduced the stranger with his accustomed eloquence, and concluded a few happy remarks of a general character with this observation:
"And now, my friends, we shall soon all know what I personally have often wondered—what are Keats!"
* * *