There is a lot to be said for the cheap car, we read. Yes; but it is just as well not to say it when there are women and children around.
* * *
Mother: It is rude to whisper, Humphrey.
Humphrey (aged five): Well, I was saying what a funny nose that man's got. So you see it would have been much ruder if I'd said it aloud.
* * *
She (pouting): You don't value my kisses as you used to.
He: Value them? Why, before we were married I used to expect a dozen in payment for a box of candy, and now I consider only one of them sufficient payment for a new dress.
* * *
KNOWLEDGE
The son of the family was home on his first vacation since he had attained to the dignity of college prefect. He and his father were discussing affairs of the day, and finally the boy remarked: "Say, Guv, I hope when I am as old as you are, I'll know more than you do."