"Good morning, Father," said one of the boys.

"Hush, he ain't no father," said the other, "he's got a wife and two kids."

* * *

WEDDING DECLARED OFF

John Willie (pleadingly): "Why can't we be married right away, Elsie?"

Elsie (coyly): "Oh, I can't bear to leave father alone just now."

John Willie (earnestly): "But, my darling, he has had you such a very long time."

Elsie (freezingly): "Sir!"

* * *

PERHAPS!