A pompous Scottish laird met a farmer one morning, and observed:
"Well, Sandy, you're getting very bent. Why don't you stand up straight, like me?"
"Eh, mon," replied Sandy, "d'ye see yon field of corn?"
"I do," said the laird.
"Ah, weel," said Sandy, "ye'll notice that the full heids hang down, an' that the empty yins stand up."
* * *
WITH A RESERVATION
"Miss Smith—Belinda," sighed the young man, passionately, "there is something I want to tell you—something that I——"
"What is it?" asked the girl, as she leaned back in her chair, with a bored expression on her face.
The young man drew a long breath, and his face turned to dull purple. "It is a question which is very near to any heart," he said awkwardly. "Could you—do you think you could ever marry a man like me?"