* * *

Interviewer: "What sort of girls make the best show-girls?"

Stage Manager: "Those who have the most to show, of course."

* * *

She: "What do you mean by kissing me? What do you mean?"

He: "Er—er—nothing."

She: "Then don't you dare do it again. I won't have any man kissing me unless he means business, d'ye hear?"

* * *

Foreman: "'Ow is it that little feller always carries two planks to your one?"