"Jim," the exhorter questioned sadly at last, "ain't you teched by the story of the Lord what died to save yer soul?"
"Humph!" Jim retorted contemptuously. "Air ye aimin' to tell me the Lord died to save me, when He ain't never seed me, ner knowed me?"
"Jim," the missionary explained with fervor, "it was a darn sight easier for the Lord to die fer ye jest because He never seed ye than if He knowed ye as well as we-alls do!"
COOKERY
The housewife gave the tramp a large piece of pie on condition that he should saw some wood. The tramp retired to the woodshed, but presently he reappeared at the back door of the house with the piece of pie still intact save for one mouthful bitten from the end.
"Madam," he said respectfully to the wondering woman, "if it's all the same to you, I'll eat the wood, and saw the pie."
COURTESY
The witness was obviously a rustic and quite new to the ways of a court-room. So, the judge directed him:
"Speak to the jury, sir—the men sitting behind you on the benches."