DEFINITION

The schoolboy, after profound thought, wrote this definition of the word "spine," at his teacher's request.

"A spine is a long, limber bone. Your head sets on one end and you set on the other."

DEGREES IN DEGRADATION

Phil May, the artist, when once down on his luck in Australia, took a job as waiter in a very low-class restaurant. An acquaintance came into the place to dine, and was aghast when he discovered the artist in his waiter.

"My God!" he whispered. "To find you in such a place as this."

Phil May smiled, as he retorted:

"Oh, but, you see, I don't eat here."

DELAY