“Shure,” said Clancy, as he peeled the paper off a tomato can and threw it to the goat; “an’ it’s a quare langwidge thot we Amer’kans hov. Oi wint out to this Fort Hamilton th’ other day wid Biddy boi me soide, for Oi got to thinkin’ thot it wur th’ dooty av ivry citizen to make himself acquainted wid all thot phwich makes his counthry great. An’ it’s barely in the grounds we are befoor wan av thim sentries sez, sez he, ‘Who goes there?’”
“‘Phwere?’ I asks, turnin’ round.
“Who goes there!” he yells wance agin wid a thrifle higher infliction.
“‘Oi asked yez phwere?’ sez Oi wid some slight asper-ritty in me tones.
“Now phwin he yells ‘Who goes there?’ agin it’s mad Oi got. Oi tould him thot Oi wuz willin’ loike a gintlemon to hilp him wid his quistion, but thot Oi didn’t see anybody goin’ there or annyphwere, an’ thot Oi thought Oi wuz bein’ guyed, an’ afther callin’ him a sassenach Oi threatened to divist his donkey hid av it’s ears, phwich th’ same led to a foight, an’ the foight led me to th’ guard-house. How th’ divil wur Oi to know thot ‘Who goes there?’ means ‘Who are yez?’
“Shure an’ it’s a quare langwidge thot we Amer’kans hov.”
Mike and Murphy had hired a boat for the day. All went well till the afternoon, when, unfortunately, the boat sprang a leak and water rushed in at a terrible rate. Murphy began bailing as hard as he could; but looking up a moment or so later, he saw Mike apparently busy over something else at the other end of the boat.