“But … that's somehow strange——”
“Girl, you're afraid of the scandal? Yes, there'll be an unusual, a grandiose scandal, but a thousand scandals are better than that you should remain here! I won't leave you here! I can't leave you here! Olga, do you understand? Cast aside your faint-heartedness, your womanly logic, and obey me! Obey me if you do not desire your own ruin!”
Olga's eyes said that she did not understand me.… Meanwhile time did not stop but went its course, and it was impossible for us to remain standing in the avenue while they were expecting us there. We had to decide.… I pressed to my heart “the girl in red,” who actually was my wife now, and at that moment it appeared to me that I really loved her.… loved her with a husband's love, that she was mine, and that her fate rested on my conscience.… I saw that I was united with this creature for ever, irrevocably.
“Listen, my darling, my treasure!” I said. “It's a bold step.… It will separate us from our nearest friends; it will call down upon our heads a thousand reproaches and tearful lamentations. Perhaps it will even spoil my career; it will cause me a thousand unsurmountable unpleasantnesses, but, my darling, it is settled! You will be my wife!… I want no better wife. God preserve me from all other women! I will make you happy; I will take care of you like the apple of my eye, as long as I live; I will educate you—make a woman of you! I promise you this, and here is my honest hand on it!”
I spoke with sincere passion, with feeling, like a stage lover acting the most pathetic scene of his part. I spoke very well, I seemed to be inspired by the touch of an eagle's wing that was soaring over our heads. My Olia took my outstretched hand, held it in her own small hands, and kissed it tenderly. But this was not a sign of assent. On the silly little face of an inexperienced woman who had never before heard such speech, there appeared a look of perplexity.… She still could not understand me.
“You say I am to go to you?” she said reflectively. “I don't quite understand you.… Don't you know what he would say?”
“What have you to do with what he would say?”
“How so? No, Serezha! Better say no more.… Please leave that alone.… You love me, and I want nothing more. With your love I'm ready to go to hell.”
“But, little fool, how will you manage it?”
“I shall live here, and you—why you will come every day.… I will come to meet you.”