"I claim the right to express my sentiments here," said Mr. Hinkins, in a slightly indignant tone, "and I shall brook no interruption, if I am a Softmore."
"You couldn't be MORE SOFT, my young friend," I observed, whereupon there was cries of Order! order!"
"I regret I can't mingle in this strife personally," said the young man.
"You might inlist as a liberty-pole," said I, in a silvery whisper.
"But," he added, "I have a voice, and that voice is for war." The young man then closed his speech with some strikin and orginal remarks in relation to the star-spangled banner. He was followed by the village minister, a very worthy man indeed, but whose sermons have a tendency to make people sleep pretty industriously.
"I am willin' to inlist for one," he said.
"What's your weight, parson?" I asked.
"A hundred and sixty pounds," he said.
"Well, you can inlist as a hundred and sixty pounds of morphine, your dooty bein' to stand in the hospitals arter a battle, and preach while the surgical operations is bein' performed! Think how much you'd save the Gov'ment in morphine."
He didn't seem to see it; but he made a good speech, and the editor of the "Bugle" rose to read the resolutions, commencin' as follers: