Mr. Shakespeare.—A murrain on these gallants! They have no ear for a catch and should get them to a monastery. But I’ll sit like my grandsire, carved in alabaster. Who’s the young spark, now speaking?
Dr. J. (shocked).—The young spark, sir, is His Royal Highness the Prince of Wales.
Mr. Sheridan.—Egad! This reminds me of old times, but the young man is not a bit like my friend Prinny. And though I managed Drury Lane, I never got Prinny on my stage.
Dr. J.—Sir, your Prinny never had so good a cause to be there. He only thought he fought in the wars; but this Prince is a real ex-Service man, pleading for the ex-Service men, his comrades in arms. He has been a soldier, and not a man of us in this box but wishes he could say as much for himself. Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier; but he will think less meanly if he can help those who have. That is the very purpose of this numerous assembly.
Mr. Shakespeare.—Oh, most learned doctor, a Daniel come to judgment! I’ faith I am most heartily of thy mind, and would drink a loving toast to the young Prince and another to the ex-Service fellows, and eke a third to this—how runs it?—this numerous assembly. (Sings.) “And let me the canakin clink, clink, and——”
The House (in a frenzy of indignation).—Sh-h-h! Turn him out! (Hisses.)
Mr. Shakespeare.—What! the “bird”! Well-a-day, this isn’t the first time they’ve hissed my Ghost.
Mr. Kean.—Sir, they’ve hissed me!
Mr. Shakespeare.—Ha! say’st thou, honest Ned! But thou wast a jackanapes to let thyself be caught with the Alderman’s wife and——
Mrs. S. (icily).—Mr. Shakespeare, there are ladies present.