Mud and misery, flies and stench,

Piggin' it here in a beastly trench,

But what I mean, by Jove, you see,

I like my men and they don't mind me,

So, on the whole, I'd rather be

Where I am.”

What does the enemy say?

“Kolossal Verdam!

They told me, when the war began,

The British Tommy always ran,