The Astonishing History of Troy Town

by Arthur Quiller-Couch

"I beg your pardon?" he observed mildly.

"Go away!"

"If you will allow me—" he began, courteously addressing vacancy.

"Monster!"

The awful truth began to dawn upon him, and was followed by a hasty impulse to dive.

"If," he stammered, "I am right in supposing myself to address a lady—"

"Don't talk to me, but go away."

"I was about to ask permission to resume my spectacles, which I have unfortunately laid aside."

"No, no. That would be worse. Oh! go away at once."

"Pardon me, madam. I am aware that spectacles are insufficient as a—I mean, I did not propose to consider them in the light of a costume, but as an assistance to my sight, without which—"