The Big Drum: A Comedy in Four Acts

by Arthur Wing Pinero

Westrip.

Parade?

Miss Tracer.

We've two new women in the house who are perfect idiots. They can't remember to say "yes, my lady" and "no, my lady" and "very good, my lady" whenever Lady Filson speaks to them. One of them actually addressed her yesterday as "ma'am." I wonder the roof didn't fall in.

Westrip.

[Meditatively.] I've noticed that Sir Randle and Lady Filson have a great relish for being Sir'd and Lady'd.

Miss Tracer.

Ha, ha! Rather! [Over her shoulder.] You take a friendly hint. If your predecessor had Sir Randle'd and Lady Filson'd them more frequently, you wouldn't be standing in his shoes at this moment.

Westrip.

[In the middle of the room, his hands in his pockets.] Why was Sir Randle knighted, do you know?