“Gosh, I'd like to give her a real warm reception,” said Jack Bates, who had a reputation for mischief. “I know them Eastern folks, down t' the ground. They think cow-punchers wear horns. Yes, they do. They think we're holy terrors that eat with our six-guns beside our plates—and the like of that. They make me plum tired. I'd like to—wish we knew her brand.”
“I can tell you that,” said Chip, cynically. “There's just two bunches to choose from. There's the Sweet Young Things, that faint away at sight of a six-shooter, and squawk and catch at your arm if they see a garter snake, and blush if you happen to catch their eye suddenly, and cry if you don't take off your hat every time you see them a mile off.” Chip held out his cup for Patsy to refill.
“Yeah—I've run up against that brand—and they're sure all right. They suit ME,” remarked Cal.
“That don't seem to line up with the doctor's diploma,” commented Weary.
“Well, she's the other kind then—and if she is, the Lord have mercy on the Flying U! She'll buy her some spurs and try to rope and cut out and help brand. Maybe she'll wear double-barreled skirts and ride a man's saddle and smoke cigarettes. She'll try to go the men one better in everything, and wind up by making a darn fool of herself. Either kind's bad enough.”
“I'll bet she don't run in either bunch,” began Weary. “I'll bet she's a skinny old maid with a peaked nose and glasses, that'll round us up every Sunday and read tracts at our heads, and come down on us with both feet about tobacco hearts and whisky livers, and the evils and devils wrapped up in a cigarette paper. I seen a woman doctor, once—she was stopping at the T Down when I was line-riding for them—and say, she was a holy fright! She had us fellows going South before a week. I stampeded clean off the range, soon as my month was up.”
“Say,” interrupted Cal, “don't yuh remember that picture the Old Man got last fall, of his sister? She was the image of the Old Man—and mighty near as old.”
Chip, thinking of the morrow's drive, groaned in real anguish of spirit.
“You won't dast t' roll a cigarette comin' home, Chip,” predicted Happy Jack, mournfully. “Yuh want t' smoke double goin' in.”
“I don't THINK I'll smoke double going in,” returned Chip, dryly. “If the old girl don't like my style, why the walking isn't all taken up.”