“The army!” exclaimed my mother, clasping her hands, and looking involuntarily at my uncle’s cork leg.
“The army!” repeated my father, peevishly. “Bless my soul, Roland, you seem to think man is made for nothing else but to be shot at! You would not like the army, Pisistratus?”
“Why, sir, not if it pained you and my dear mother; otherwise, indeed—”
“Papae!” said my father, interrupting me. “This all comes of your giving the boy that ambitious, uncomfortable name, Mrs. Caxton; what could a Pisistratus be but the plague of one’s life? That idea of serving his country is Pisistratus ipsissimus all over. If ever I have another son (Dii meliora!) he has only got to be called Eratostratus, and then he will be burning down St. Paul’s,—which I believe was, by the way, first made out of the stones of a temple to Diana. Of the two, certainly, you had better serve your country with a goose-quill than by poking a bayonet into the ribs of some unfortunate Indian; I don’t think there are any other people whom the service of one’s country makes it necessary to kill just at present, eh, Roland?”
“It is a very fine field, India,” said my uncle, sententiously; “it is the nursery of captains.”
“Is it? Those plants take up a good deal of ground, then, that might be more profitably cultivated. And, indeed, considering that the tallest captains in the world will be ultimately set into a box not above seven feet at the longest, it is astonishing what a quantity of room that species of arbor mortis takes in the growing! However, Pisistratus, to return to your request, I will think it over, and talk to Trevanion.”
“Or rather to Lady Ellinor,” said I, imprudently: my mother slightly shivered, and took her hand from mine. I felt cut to the heart by the slip of my own tongue.
“That, I think, your mother could do best,” said my father, dryly, “if she wants to be quite convinced that somebody will see that your shirts are aired. For I suppose they mean you to lodge at Trevanion’s.”
“Oh, no!” cried my mother; “he might as well go to college then. I thought he was to stay with us,—only go in the morning, but, of course, sleep here.”
“If I know anything of Trevanion,” said my father, “his secretary will be expected to do without sleep. Poor boy! you don’t know what it is you desire. And yet, at your age, I—” my father stopped short. “No!” he renewed abruptly, after a long silence, and as if soliloquizing,—“no; man is never wrong while he lives for others. The philosopher who contemplates from the rock is a less noble image than the sailor who struggles with the storm. Why should there be two of us? And could he be an alter ego, even if I wished it? Impossible!” My father turned on his chair, and laying the left leg on the right knee, said smilingly, as he bent down to look me full in the face: “But, Pisistratus, will you promise me always to wear the saffron bag?”