Scratch across his back went one of those ingenious mechanical contrivances familiarly in vogue at fairs, which are designed to impress upon the victim to whom they are applied, the pleasing conviction that his garment is rent in twain.
The boy turned round so quickly that he caught the arm of the offender,—a pretty village-girl, a year or two younger than himself. “Found in the act, sentenced, punished,” cried he, snatching a kiss, and receiving a gentle slap. “And now, good for evil, here’s a ribbon for you; choose.”
The girl slunk back shyly, but her companions pushed her forward, and she ended by selecting a cherry-coloured ribbon, for which the boy paid carelessly, while his elder and wiser friend looked at him with grave, compassionate rebuke, and grumbled out,—“Dr. Franklin tells us that once in his life he paid too dear for a whistle; but then he was only seven years old, and a whistle has its uses. But to pay such a price for a scratch-back!—Prodigal! Come along.”
As the friends strolled on, naturally enough all the young girls who wished for ribbons, and were possessed of scratch-backs, followed in their wake. Scratch went the instrument, but in vain.
“Lasses,” said the elder, turning sharply upon them his nose in the air, “ribbons are plentiful,—shillings scarce; and kisses, though pleasant in private, are insipid in public. What, still! Beware! know that, innocent as we seem, we are women-eaters; and if you follow us farther, you are devoured!” So saying, he expanded his jaws to a width so preternaturally large, and exhibited a row of grinders so formidable, that the girls fell back in consternation. The friends turned down a narrow alley between the booths, and though still pursued by some adventurous and mercenary spirits, were comparatively undisturbed as they threaded their way along the back of the booths, and arrived at last on the village-green, and in front of the Great Stage.
“Oho, Lionel!” quoth the elder friend; “Thespian and classical,—worth seeing, no doubt.” Then turning to a grave cobbler in leathern apron, who was regarding with saturnine interest the motley figures ranged in front of the curtain as the Drumatis Persona, he said, “You seem attracted, sir; you have probably already witnessed the performance.” “Yes,” returned the Cobbler; “this is the third day, and to-morrow’s the last. I are n’t missed once yet, and I sha’ n’t miss; but it are n’t what it was a while back.”
“‘That is sad; but then the same thing is said of everything by everybody who has reached your respectable age, friend. Summers, and suns, stupid old watering-places, and pretty young women, `are n’t what they were a while back.’ If men and things go on degenerating in this way, our grandchildren will have a dull time of it.”
The Cobbler eyed the young man, and nodded approvingly. He had sense enough to comprehend the ironical philosophy of the reply; and our Cobbler loved talk out of the common way. “You speaks truly and cleverly, sir. But if old folks do always say that things are worse than they were, ben’t there always summat in what is always said? I’m for the old times; my neighbour, Joe Spruce, is for the new, and says we are all a-progressing. But he ‘s a pink; I ‘m a blue.”
“You are a blue?” said the boy Lionel; “I don’t understand.”
“Young ‘un, I’m a Tory,—that’s blue; and Spruce is a Rad,—that’s pink! And, what is more to the purpose, he is a tailor, and I’m a cobbler.”