"Yestreen, when I retired to bed,
I had a funny dream;
Imagination backward sped
Up History's ancient stream.
A falconer in fullest dress
Was teaching me his art;
Of tercel, eyas, hood, and jess,
The terms I learnt by heart.
"He flew his falcon to attack
The osprey, swan, and hern,
And showed me, when he wished it back,
The lure for its return.
I thought it was a noble sport;
I struggled to excel
My gentle teacher, and, in short,
I managed rather well.
"The dream is o'er, and I to-day
Return to modern time;
But yet I've something more to say,
If you will list my rhyme.
I've been a witness in a case
For seven long mortal hours,
And, cross-examined, had to face
The counsel's keenest powers.
"With courteous phrase and winning smiles
He led me gently on;
I fell a victim to his wiles—
But how he changed anon!
'Oh, you're prepared to swear to that!'
And, 'Now, sir, just take care!'
And, 'Come, be cautious what you're at!'
With questions hard to bear.
"And when he'd turned me inside out,
He turned me outside in;
I knew not what I was about—
My brain was all a-spin,
I'm shaking now with nervous fright,
And since I left the court
I've changed my dream-opinion quite—
I don't think Hawkins sport!"
Before concluding the evening, Toole said,—
"You remember your joke, Sir Henry, about Miss Brain and her black kids?"
"Not for the world, not for the world, my dear Toole!"
"Not for the world, Sir Henry, not for the world; only for us; not before the boys! You said it was the best joke you ever made."
"And the worst. But I was not a Judge then.">[