Alice didn’t dare to argue the point, but went on: “And I thought I’d try and find my way to the top of that hill—”
“When you say ‘hill,’” the Queen interrupted, “I could show you hills in comparison with which you’d call this a valley.”
“No, I shouldn’t,” said Alice, surprised into contradicting her at last. “A hill can’t be a valley you know. That would be nonsense—”
The Red Queen shook her head.
“You may call it ‘nonsense’ if you like,” she said, “but I’ve heard nonsense compared with which that would be as sensible as a dictionary!”
Which last remark seemed to settle the matter, for Alice had nothing further to say on the subject.
Nonsense, indeed; and what delightful nonsense it is! Is it any wonder that the little girls for whom Lewis Carroll labored so lovingly should reward him with their laughter?
Alice entered Checker-Board Land in the Red Queen’s company; she was apprenticed as a pawn, with the promise that when she entered the eighth square she would become a queen [she probably was confusing chess with checkers], and the Red Queen explained how she would travel.
“A pawn goes two squares in its first move, you know, so you’ll go very quickly through the third square, by railway, I should think, and you’ll find yourself in the fourth square in no time. Well, that square belongs to Tweedledum and Tweedledee, and the fifth is mostly water, the sixth belongs to Humpty Dumpty, ... the seventh square is all forest. However, one of the knights will show you the way, and in the eighth square we shall be queens together, and its all feasting and fun.”
The rest of her adventures occurred on those eight squares—sometimes in company with the Red Queen or the White Queen or both. Things went more rapidly than in Wonderland, the people were brisker and smarter. When the Red Queen left her on the border of Checker-Board Land, she gave her this parting advice: