“'Tis well to be on good terms with all your fellow-students, and I am pleased to hear you are so; but while a courteous behavior is due to all, select the most deserving only for your friendships, and, before this becomes intimate, weigh their dispositions and character well. True friendship is a plant of slow growth; to be sincere, there must be a congeniality of temper and pursuits. Virtue and vice can not be allied; nor can idleness and industry. Of course, if you resolve to adhere to the two former of these extremes, an intimacy with those who incline to the latter of them would be extremely embarrassing to you: it would be a stumbling-block in your way, and act like a millstone hung to your neck, for it is the nature of idleness and vice to obtain as many votaries as they can.
“I would guard you, too, against imbibing hasty and unfavorable impressions of any one. Let your judgment always balance well before you decide; and even then, where there is no occasion for expressing an opinion, it is best to be silent, for there is nothing more certain than that it is at all times more easy to make enemies than friends. And besides, to speak evil of any one, unless there are unequivocal proofs of their deserving it, is an injury for which there is no adequate reparation. For, as Shakespeare says, 'He that robs me of my good name enriches not himself, but renders me poor indeed,' or words to that effect. Keep in mind that scarcely any change would be agreeable to you at first, from the sudden transition, and from never having been accustomed to shift or rough it; and, moreover, that if you meet with collegiate fare, it will be unmanly to complain. My paper reminds me it is time to conclude.”
“Mount Vernon, 4th June, 1797.
“Your letter of the twenty-ninth ultimo came to hand by the post of Friday, and eased my mind of many unpleasant sensations and reflections on your account. It has, indeed, done more—it has filled it with pleasure more easy to be conceived than expressed; and if your sorrow and repentance for the disquietude occasioned by the preceding letter—your resolution to abandon the ideas which were therein expressed—are sincere, I shall not only heartily forgive, but will forget also, and bury in oblivion all that has passed....
“You must not suffer the resolution you have recently entered into, to operate as the mere result of a momentary impulse, occasioned by the letters you have received from hence. This resolution should be founded on sober reflection, and a thorough conviction of your error; otherwise it will be as wavering as the wind, and become the sport of conflicting passions, which will occasion such a lassitude in your exertions as to render your studies of little avail. To insure permanency, think seriously of the advantages which are to be derived, on the one hand, from the steady pursuit of a course of study to be marked out by your preceptor, whose judgment, experience, and acknowledged abilities, enables him to direct them; and, on the other hand, revolve as seriously on the consequences which would inevitably result from an indisposition to this measure, or from an idle habit of hankering after unprofitable amusements at your time of life, before you have acquired that knowledge which would be found beneficial in every situation—I say before, because it is not my wish that, having gone through the essentials, you should be deprived of any rational amusement afterward; or, lastly, from dissipation in such company as you would most likely meet under such circumstances, who but too often mistake ribaldry for wit, and rioting, swearing, intoxication, and gambling, for manliness.”
Young Custis was placed in the college at Annapolis in the spring of 1798, when Washington wrote to Mr. M'Dowell, the president, as follows:—
“Mr. Custis possesses competent talents to fit him for any studies, but they are counteracted by an indolence of mind which renders it difficult to draw them into action. Doctor Stuart having been an attentive observer of this, I shall refer you to him for the development of the causes, while justice from me requires I should add, that I know of no vice to which this inertness can be attributed. From drinking and gaming he is perfectly free; and if he has a propensity to any other impropriety, it is hidden from me. He is generous, and regardful of truth.
“As his family, fortune, and talents (if the latter can be improved), give him just pretensions to become a useful member of society in the councils of his country, his friends, and none more than myself, are extremely desirous that his education should be liberal, polished, and suitable for this end.”
Young Custis did not remain long at Annapolis. He was now eighteen years of age, and his mind was filled with visions of military glory. He received the appointment of cornet of horse, early in January, 1799, and was soon afterward promoted to the position of aid-de-camp to General Pinckney. As the army was not called to the field, he remained at Mount Vernon, awaiting orders. Meanwhile, Washington endeavored to keep him engaged in his studies, but with little success, as appears by the following extract from a letter to Doctor Stuart, young Custis's stepfather, written on the twenty-second of January, 1799, soon after the cornet received his appointment:—
“Dear Sir: Washington leaves this to-day on a visit to Hope Park, which will afford you an opportunity to examine the progress he has made in the studies he was directed to pursue.