Dear Jones: You cannot expect much tact from two fifes and a bass drum, but unless my ears deceive me they have greeted the bride with a well-meant attempt at “Home, Sweet Home.”

Baby Van Rensselaer:

“And each responsive soul has heard

That plaintive note’s appealing.

So deeply ‘Home, Sweet Home’ has stirred

The hidden founts of feeling.”

Dear Jones [surprised]: Why—how did you know that poem?

Baby Van Rensselaer: Oh, I heard somebody quote it last Decoration Day—I don’t know who—it struck me as very pretty and I looked it up.

Dear Jones [pleased]: Oh, I remember. It has always been a favorite of mine.

Baby Van Rensselaer [coldly]: Indeed?