Discourses of Brigham Young

by Brigham Young

A child loves the smiles of its mother, but hates her frowns. I tell the mothers not to allow the children to indulge in evils, but at the same time to treat them with mildness. If a child is required to step in a certain direction, and it does not seem willing to do so, gently put it in the desired way, and say, There, my little dear, you must step when I speak to you. Children need directing and teaching what is right in a kind, affectionate manner. 8:74.

You cannot break down the indomitable will of the human family. I have known children to be so abused and whipped as to render them almost or entirely worthless, and still the indomitable will remained. 6:332.

Now understand it—when parents whip their children for reading novels, and never let them go to the theater, or to any place of recreation and amusement, but bind them to the moral law, until duty becomes loathsome to them; when they are freed by age from the rigorous training of their parents, they are more fit for companions to devils, than to be the children of such religious parents. 2:94.

It never hurts my feelings to see young exuberant life and animation manifest themselves. Do not be discouraged about the follies of the young. 7:336.

You see, hear and witness a good deal of contention among children—some of you do, if not all—and I will give you a few words with regard to your future lives, that you may have children that are not contentious, not quarrelsome. Always be good-natured yourselves, is the first step. Never allow yourselves to become out of temper and get fretful. Why, mother says, "this is a very mischievous little boy or little girl." What do you see? That amount of vitality in those little children that they cannot be still. If they cannot do anything else they will tip over the chairs, cut up and pull away at anything to raise a row. They are so full of life that they cannot contain themselves; and they are something like ourselves—boys. They have so much vitality in them that their bones fairly ache with strength. They have such an amount of vitality—life, strength and activity, that they must dispose of them; and the young ones will contend with each other. Do not be out of temper yourselves. Always sympathize with them and soothe them. Be mild and pleasant. 19:69.

I believe in indulging children, in a reasonable way. If the little girls want dolls, shall they have them? Yes. But must they be taken to the dressmaker's to be dressed? No. Let the girls learn to cut and sew the clothing for their dolls, and in a few years they will know how to make a dress for themselves and others. Let the little boys have tools, and let them make their sleds, little wagons, etc., and when they grow up, they are acquainted with the use of tools and can build a carriage, a house, or anything else. 9:173.

Be careful of the clothing, you have. Do not let your children's clothing lie underfoot when you undress them at night, but teach your boys and girls, when they come into the house, to find a place for their hats, cloaks, and bonnets, that, when they want them, they can put their hands upon them in a moment. When they take off their boots and shoes, let them be deposited where they can be found in the dark, that, if the children are obliged to get up at night, perhaps in case of fire, they can find their clothing, and not be under the necessity of being turned out naked. If a person can put his hand on his clothing, he can dress in the dark. 9:172-3.

What did you promise your little girl if she would do so and so? Did you promise her a present for well doing? "Yes." Have you recollected it? "No, it has gone from my mind," says the mother. If she does ill have you promised her a chastisement? "Yes." Did you keep your word? You have not, and the child forms the conclusion in its own mind directly that the mother tells that which is not true—she says she will do this or that, and she does not do it. It is an easy lesson for mothers to learn to pass their time with their children and never give them a false impression. Think before you speak; promise your children nothing. If you wish to make them presents, do so; if you promise a chastisement, keep your word, but be cautious! 13:244.

Mothers, will you be missionaries? We will appoint you a mission to teach your children their duty, and instead of ruffles and fine dresses to adorn the body, teach them that which will adorn their minds. Let what you have to clothe them with be neat and clean and nice. Teach them cleanness and purity of body and the principles of salvation, and they will delight to come to these meetings. 14:220.

I delight to see the mother teach her daughters to be housekeepers, to be particular, clean, and neat; to sew, spin, and weave; to make butter and cheese; and I have no objection to their learning to cultivate flowers, herbs, and useful shrubs in the gardens. It is good for their health to rise early in the morning and work in the soil an hour or two before breakfast, this practice is especially beneficial to those who have weak lungs. And while you delight in raising flowers, etc., do not neglect to learn how to take care of the cream, and how to make of it good wholesome butter, and of the milk good healthy nutritious cheese; neither forget your sewing, spinning, and weaving; and I would not have them neglect to learn music and would encourage them to read history and the Scriptures, to take up a newspaper, geography, and other publications, and make themselves acquainted with the manners and customs of distant kingdoms and nations, with their laws, religion, geographical location on the face of the world, their climate, natural productions, the extent of their commerce, and the nature of their political organization; in fine, let our boys and girls be thoroughly instructed in every useful branch of physical and mental education. Let this education begin early. Teach little children the principles of order; the little girl to put the broom in its right place, to arrange the stove furniture in the neatest possible way, and everything in its own place. Teach them to lay away their clothing neatly, and where it can be found; and when they tear their frocks and aprons teach them how to mend the rent so neatly that the place cannot be seen at a short distance; and instead of asking your husbands to buy them ribbons and frills, teach them to make them of the material we can produce. Teach the little boys to lay away the garden hoe, the spade, etc., where they will not be destroyed by rust; and let them have access to tools that they may learn their use, and develop their mechanical skill while young; and see that they gather up the tools when they have done with them, and deposit them in the proper place. Let both males and females encourage within them mechanical ingenuity, and seek constantly to understand the world they are in, and what use to make of their existence. 9:188-189.