Statements.—"In infancy the young Kurnai is an object of love and pride to its father and mother. From observation of various tribes in far distant parts of Australia, I can assert confidently that love for their children is a marked feature in the aboriginal character. I cannot recollect having ever seen a parent beat or cruelly use a child; and a short road to the good-will of parents is, as amongst us, by noticing and admiring their children." The greatest grief is exhibited at the death of a child by all the relatives in a camp. These observations refer as well to the Kurnai and the other South-Eastern tribes, as to the Dieri, of whom the author gives an illustrative story.[666] The boy lives with his parents and "is very much under the control of his mother."—This statement is very valuable. It gives us the opinion of perhaps our best Australian observer on the psychology of parental feelings; it refers to all the tribes known to Howitt, i. e. to a very extensive area. And it states in plain terms that the feelings of love and affection for children which form the chief characteristic of parental relations are to be found with an intensity which is as strong as that prevailing in our society. In another place the same author quotes an instance "of a mother watching her sick child and refusing all food, and when it died she was inconsolable."[667]
Curr says that among the Bangerang the father had absolute authority over his children.[668] In another place he says that the father had to decide in case of infanticide and in every more important occasion of the child's life.[669] But we read: "Parents were much attached to their children and rarely punished or corrected them." Not only did they not control them (although occasionally a child was beaten in a fit of anger),[670] but "they were habitually indulged in every way; and as a consequence, in case of the boys at least, grew up as self-willed, thorough little tyrants as can well be imagined."[671]
In his general book on Australia the same author gives us some more information on family life. The father makes small weapons as toys for his sons. The children are seldom chastised and they are very independent. The real training of the boys begins when they leave their parents' camp and undergo the series of initiations.[672] These statements point also unmistakably to feelings of attachment and love, which are, as we tried to prove above, the very essence of family ties. The father seems to care as much as the mother for his children's education, and he is very kind and lenient to them.
As a crude and pathetic example of maternal love there is the case reported by Angas, of a mother carrying for ten years the corpse of her dead child.[673] Similar cases are reported by Howitt about the Kurnai.[674]
We find many statements referring to this subject in the compilation of Br. Smyth. I mention them only shortly, as the author was never directly acquainted with the aboriginal life, and we value him only when he quotes some little-known authorities, or gives actual facts gathered for him by his correspondents. He speaks of the heavy task of a woman having to carry her babe, besides all the other work and trouble of a journey.[675] The father occasionally nurses the baby too and is very fond of it.[676] The child is suckled for three years; it is carried in an opossum rug during infancy and attended to solely by its mother.[677] A description of the way in which an opossum rug is dried is given.[678] In another passage the same author speaks again of the general kindness, affection and indulgence of parents to children, as of a well-known fact. He adds besides that the parents were very judicious in the treatment of their children.[679]
"As a general rule, both fathers and mothers are very kind to their children and very rarely indeed strike them; and I have been often amused at seeing a rebellious urchin, of perhaps eight or nine years of age, take up his mimic spears, run a few yards away and then hurl them with all his force at his mother." "They are very fond of their children, and will at any time venture their lives for them."[680] And the author tells of an occurrence in corroboration.[681] Here, again, we hear of kindness, leniency and real affection. The instance of a native losing his life in trying to save his child is very convincing.
The children that escape infanticide enjoy great affection from their parents.[682]
Of the Lower Darling River tribes it is stated that the children are not only very leniently treated by their parents, but that they are not spoilt at all. "One word from the parent generally is sufficient to check a child when doing wrong, and the greatest respect is shown to parents by their children."[683] The loss of a child would be lamented by the whole camp; the mother and near relatives would especially mourn.[684] A description of the mode of carrying children by their mother is also given by the same author.[685] In this statement we may remark that the children are said not to be spoilt; this does not agree quite with some of our other statements. But this information agrees with all others in respect of the affection and lenient treatment the children enjoy.
According to Mitchell children are carried by the mother in skin bags on the shoulder. She carries also toys for her children.[686] As we have said above, the close connection in life between child and mother must have been of importance in making the tie between them especially close. The existence of toys, mentioned already in J. M. Davis' statement, characterizes the tender care bestowed on the young folk by their parents.
"The child is brought up with great care.... Should it cry, it is passed from one person to another and caressed and soothed, and the father will frequently nurse it for several hours together. When the child commences to walk, the father gives it a name."[687] They are long suckled—sometimes up to five or six years of age. A boy "when weaned, accompanies his father upon short excursions, upon which occasion the father takes every opportunity to instruct his son. For instance, if they arrive at a place concerning which they have any tradition, it is told to the child if old enough to understand it. Or he shows him how to procure this or that animal, or other article of food, in the easiest way."[688] We see here that the tie between father and child is a very close one. The father nurses the child when it is small, and educates it when it is bigger. Affection, care and kind treatment are stated here as everywhere else. And again we read: "If the father dies before a child is born, the child is put to death by the mother."[689] This marks again how important is the father's part in bringing up a child.
Wyatt says of the Adelaide tribe that "they display strong affection towards each other," which is shown especially in a "great fondness for children."[690]
We read about the Port Lincoln tribes: "Both sexes are very fond of their children."[691]
Howitt, speaking of infanticide among the Murring tribe, adds: "Yet they are very fond of their offspring, and very indulgent to those they keep, rarely striking them, and a mother would give all the food she had to her children, going hungry herself."[692] In several statements on infanticide it is said that no difference was made between boys and girls.[693] Here again we have a strong assertion of parental love, and of the kind treatment the children enjoy.
Among the Murrumbidgee tribes "it is well known that as their children become older they [the parents] evince much attachment towards them."[694] A well-known tragic instance of parental love is reported about the New South Wales natives by the same author. "They display an extraordinary degree of affection for their dead offspring, evidenced by an act that almost exceeds credibility, had it not so often been witnessed among the tribes in the interior of the colony. I allude to the fact of deceased children, from the earliest age to even six or seven years, being placed in a bag made of kangaroo skin, and slung upon the back of the mother.... They carry them thus for ten or twelve months, sleeping upon the mass of mortal remains, which serves them for a pillow, apparently unmindful of the horrid fœtor which emanates from such a putrefying substance."[695]
G. S. Lang in his account of the Australian blacks speaks of great leniency of treatment, and quotes several examples.[696]
An exceptional statement is given by a member of the United States expedition. "As far as our observation went, the women appear to take little care of their children."[697] But we gather from the whole account that the authors had no good opportunities of making observations on the natives, if they had any at all. Probably the natives they saw were in a state of deterioration, hanging round towns, etc.
We read in the old account of J. Turnbull about the natives of New South Wales, that all children who escape infanticide are "nursed with an anxious affection, very creditable to these savages. The infant no sooner begins to use his limbs than he is instructed in throwing the spear; a bulrush or other reed being put into his hand for this purpose."[698]
In his memoirs, Hodgson says that aboriginal children are very kindly and tenderly treated by their parents.[699]
The following statements, referring to New South Wales blacks, give a good testimonial to their parental feelings. "An old mammy, who was much about the farm of another of my friends, was a perfect picture of maternal sorrow," after the death of her son. "If you spoke of her son, she was dissolved in tears, and answered in whispers." "The women appear to be always kind to their children, carrying the young ones on their backs."[700]
"They are remarkably fond of their children," says R. Dawson. In another place the author speaks of a great liberality towards children, displayed in distributing food. He speaks also of the adoption of orphans. "When the parents die, the children are adopted by the unmarried men and women and taken the greatest care of"; and "children of both sexes who had lost their parents were uniformly adopted by those who had no families, and sometimes by those who had."[701]
As a matter of illustration I may adduce what Dr. J. Fraser says on that subject in his compilation on the New South Wales tribes. The aborigines love their children and treat them very kindly. The father makes for the boy a toy spear to practise throwing it and the girl gets a small stick to learn how to dig with it. The parents teach them to do all these things, and they "take as much delight in this business as we do in teaching our children their alphabet. The son is soon able to go out with his father on hunting expeditions," imbibes all sorts of woodcraft and learns to know his tauri (hunting district).[702] We may add that the book of Dr. Fraser, although only a compilation, seems to be a very reliable one, and he probably had much personal information from settlers, missionaries, etc.
We have already seen from the first statement of Howitt that parental love obtained among the Dieri. Gason affirms that parental love for children and the love of these for their parents is one of their greatest virtues.[703] We read also that "the children are never beaten, and should any woman violate this law she is in turn beaten by her husband."[704] This statement would astonish us at first sight, as we usually expect severity from the father. But when we remember that the mother had probably all the drudgery and work with the children we can understand that she might easily lose her temper, and then the father took the children's part. It is characteristic that the father's authority was directed rather to protect the children from a probably merited punishment than to punish and correct them.
Amongst the Urabunna, where, as we are informed, "individual marriage does not exist either in name or in practice,"[705] all children of "men who are at the same level in the generation and belong to the same class and totem are regarded as the common children of these men." Still there exists "a closer tie between a man and the children of the woman who habitually live in camp with him."[706] This statement is the only one which tries to deny individual fatherhood and states the existence of group fatherhood. But as we do not know what sense should be given to the words "closer tie" and to the phrase "are regarded as the common children" we must drop this statement as quite meaningless. We know already that the relations of a father to his child have several very characteristic features; the father fondles his child; is especially attached to it; he often carries it on the march (as these same authors state in another place, see below); he has certain economic duties towards his family; he lives in the same wurley with his children. Not a single word is said about any of these things, and only quite general assertions are made. We may repeat here, with Mr. Thomas, that if the authors knew more concrete facts about this question they ought to have communicated them. If they told us everything they knew about the subject, then their inferences are false. This statement loses its force for the reason especially that we know how close the personal tie between the Dieri parents and their children was, and that it was quite individual. And the Dieri had the same Pirrauru institution which induces Messrs. Spencer and Gillen to inform us that there was no individual fatherhood or marriage, amongst the Urabunna. There is, therefore, much reason to mistrust this statement.[707]
Children are treated with extreme leniency among the Central Australian tribes. "If the children are unruly the mothers try to quiet them with fair words, or may scold them a little, or even slap them gently, but never take any extreme means." Mothers often quarrel and even fight with each other defending their own offspring. "When a child sickens, the mother takes it in her lap, and does not leave the spot, the father sitting by."[708] All this shows a deep parental affection towards the children. And that it is limited to individual parents is confirmed by the following phrase: "Orphans fare the worst, and usually the nearest relative looks after them, but does not assume a parent's position. Such children receive blows and have to provide for themselves as best they can."[709] Although I avoid the problem of relationship terms, as lying outside the narrow limits of the present study, that deals exclusively with facts of family life, I quote the following statement of the same author as especially instructive. "Kata signifies father of the class; Kata iltja sexual father." The affix iltja indicates the individual relationship and the affix lirra class reference. "Ordinarily they leave out the words iltja and lirra and do not use them, because they all know, among themselves, who is personally related, and who is not. They are only used casually when conversing with strangers, to whom they wish to explain their family relationship."[710]
We read of the Arunta: "To their children they are, we may say uniformly, with very rare exceptions, kind and considerate, carrying them, the men as well as the women taking part in this, when they get tired on the march, and always seeing that they get a good share of any food."[711] Here it is stated explicitly that the cares are shared by father and mother. In another place the authors, speaking of the burial ceremonies, say that the display of grief and sorrow is not so much due to real feeling, as to tribal custom and fear of offending the dead one's spirit. And they add, "At the same time, he (the native) is certainly capable of genuine grief and of real affection for his children."[712] The foregoing statement appears to be very emphatic. Parental love is apparently quoted as a genuine feeling conspicuous par excellence and therefore to be opposed to any other more or less fictitious display. The intimate connection between the mother and her child appears also from some details in the initiation ceremonies.[713]
In the Kabi and Wakka tribes, "the wife was the regular nurse of the infants, but the husband occasionally took a turn."[714] "Children were over-indulged."[715]
"The mother is always fond of her child, and I have often admired her patience with it. She constantly carries it with her, at first in a basket, but later on ... on her shoulder. Thus she carries it with her till it is several years old. If the child cries she may perhaps get angry, but she will never allow herself to strike it. The children are never chastised either by the father or the mother." But they are nevertheless as a rule "obliging and kind." "The black children are not ... as bad as one might suppose, considering their education, in which their wills are never resisted."[716] "The woman is often obliged to carry her little child on her shoulders during the whole day, only setting it down when she has to dig in the ground or climb trees."[717] The mother, in one instance, was much excited when a white man struck her naughty child. The same author says that the tie between mother and child is closer than that between father and child. The children "are fonder of their mother than of their father." (This seems quite "natural" to us as we observe it as a rule in our society.) Sometimes the father cares much for his child too; "he frequently carries it, takes it in his lap, searches ... its hair, plays with it, and makes little boomerangs, which he teaches it to throw. He ... prefers boys to girls." "Boys are not permitted to go hunting with their fathers before they are nine years old."[718]
Amongst the Georgina blacks the child's education is carried on chiefly by the mother. She teaches the boys respect for the tribal elders.[719]
The way of carrying a child among the Queensland blacks is described by E. Palmer.[720]
Among the North Central Queensland aborigines the mother carries her child in a koolamon or on a sheet of bark, slung to her side; later on her shoulders.[721] She is accustomed to lullaby it to sleep by a sort of droning humming sound.[722] She suckles it until it reaches the age of three to five years.[723] "A father could do what he pleased with his children, but neither parent would ever strike a boy; if beaten the latter was supposed to lose courage." The mother taught the girls, and could beat them if necessary.[724] The father taught the boys climbing trees and making arms and implements.[725]
In North-West Australia (Pilbarra district) children are reared affectionately and never chastised. They often listen to stories on native traditions.[726]
Ph. Chauncy, speaking of the West Australian blacks, says that love between children and parents was very strong, and that it was one of the principal virtues of the aborigines. He gives an example of a native who after five years, seeing again his son, a grown-up lad, displayed a good deal of affection and tenderness.[727]
The mode in which women carry their children in West Australia is described by Moore.[728]
Oldfield says: "Sometimes the love of their offspring (male) is excessive." As an example he describes an old man "who had a son, a lad of about nine years of age, of whom he was excessively fond, always tenderly embracing him and recommending him to the care of others when he went on any expedition." When he returned from the chase "he invariably first of all fondly kissed the boy before proceeding to cook," and all the best parts of the meal "were bestowed on the child." The child was consequently quite spoilt and tyrannized over his father, who was quite obedient to him.[729]
"Elles aiment d'ailleurs éperdument leurs fils et aussi celles de leurs filles qui ont échappé à la mort. S'il arrive que quelqu'un de leurs enfants s'éveille en sursaut ou se fasse du mal, ses gémissements sont couverts par ceux de la mère, qui ne se donne aucun repos jusqu'à ce qu'elle ait trouvé le moyen de guérison, quelque fatigue qu'il doive lui en couter. Elles nourrissent avec soin leurs petits enfants et les veulent toujours propres et bien tenus, autant que leur permet leur position. Elles les allaitent pendant plus de quatre ans; aussi n'est-il pas rare de voir de petits garçons jouer et faire des armes avec leurs petits ghicis, et puis courir se restaurer au sein de leur mère, qui souvent allaite ainsi deux enfants à la fois. J'ai vu des enfants de six ans prendre encore le sein, et les mères non seulement s'y prêter, mais les caresser et se priver des meilleurs morceaux pour les leur donner."[730] I quote this statement in extenso, as it includes a good deal of what we know in general of this subject. We see that a mother might suckle two children at a time, but if it were too difficult for her, the child is killed. Salvado speaks also of adoption by another woman as an alternative (comp. above, Dawson's and Shultze's statements); but adoption seems rather to be an exceptional escape from infanticide.[731] In another place, the same author speaks of a "véritable tendresse maternelle" showing itself towards a child recently dead. Often did he observe that a mother who had just lost a child would rise in the night and go for miles through the woods, calling her child by its name, speaking to it, and giving many tokens of her tender feelings.[732] This instance gives us a good insight into a class of feelings that the general, popular mind would hardly ascribe to savages.[733] Salvado says that they make a great difference between a boy and girl, in the joy which they display at a child's birth. Not only the mothers (as we saw above), but also the fathers show great fondness for their children. Salvado blames the "déférence des pères pour les enfants." Whatever a child might do, it is never chastised. If a small boy wishes to obtain something from his parents, he cries, bites and beats them, until he succeeds in his purpose. The only punishment ever inflicted on their children is "une fâcherie plus ou moins remarquée par eux, et cela encore après leur avoir accordé tout ce qu'ils demandent." The father prepares for his son small arms and teaches him how to use them. He displays the greatest tenderness towards him and is extremely fond of him.[734] And the author gives as the reason why the aborigines would not send their children to white men for education, the parental attachment to their offspring.[735] The father disposes of his daughters in marriage.[736]
Among the natives of King George Sound the mothers display a great love for their children, often crying after the death of one of them.[737]
About the same tribes it is recorded: "Of their children they appear to be fond, and rarely chastise them; but their treatment of the women is not always gentle."[738] Here the difference between the usual good treatment that children uniformly enjoy from their parents, and the unsettled character of marital treatment is clearly expressed.
Our best information on many points comes rather from anecdotes and reports of real occurrences than from bare statements. Some stories illustrate very well the present question. So, for instance, the following, which proves beyond any doubt that paternal affection among the Australian aborigines might amount to a passion.[739] Old Davie was a native of great personal strength and skill, strong will, and great courage. He was not especially clever, but was apparently kind to children and to his wives. His inoffensive exterior, however, hid a truly demoniac character; he was quite egotistical, "he had never had any strong liking for anything else," but had only one peculiar passion: "his special craving was for murder." He had ever so many lives on his conscience. When he grew old, he became the father of a rather nice boy. He got deeply and passionately attached to his son, called the Jumbuk-man. "To watch the gradual expansion of Jumbuk-man's faculties; to see him balance himself with his feet astride and throw his spear at his sister's back; to observe him tomahawk the sleeping dogs, maltreat any birds or insects he could lay hands on, bite his mother; to hear him lisp foul words, and give himself up to the charming ways of savage infancy, became henceforth the chief delight of his father." Here we see a neat, condensed picture of what might be called educational training under the father's eyes. After a few years of life the boy died; the death of the boy was a terrible blow "to Old Davie. He had been his special delight ... and (he) bore his loss in a very unstoical way. He sat on the ground, streams of tears welling from his eyes." The end of the story (Old Davie's murder of a young woman in revenge for "sorcery" done by her tribe) does not touch our subject.
As an interesting and good illustration of parental authority may be adduced the story of how a Bangerang girl was made to join her promised husband. She was, apparently, quite unwilling to do it; consequently her father tried to persuade her. After his patience had been exhausted he tried to compel her; having at last resource to his club. This and the unanimous and rather strong persuasions of both parents made her follow the prescribed course.[740] This story shows that the father had not a great amount of authority over his daughter. He had to persuade her for several hours and she brought him by her stubbornness to a fit of anger, which finally settled the matter.
Another story clearly exemplifying paternal affection, is told by Grey.[741] For some small trespass Capt. Grey got hold of a young boy, the son of an influential native. The father tried to liberate him. "The natives are always ardently attached to their children, and this the boy's father now evinced in the strongest manner. He tried by persuasion, begging and even threats to induce the white man to give him back his child. He fairly wept upon his child's neck." When this had no result, and the boy was imprisoned, he made all possible efforts to plead for him. The paternal love is clearly conspicuous in the whole tale.
Our forty-one statements agree fairly well on many points, but especially on the principal question, namely on the existence of very close personal and individual bonds of union between parents and children.[742] As so much stress has been laid on the emotional element in these bonds, it may be shown now how far the evidence confirms the views expressed above.[743] Speaking in concrete terms, the evidence affirms beyond any doubt the existence of strong feelings of affection and attachment between parents and children. Thirty-five of our forty-one statements explicitly affirm the existence of such feelings. In many places this is expressed in a very clear and emphatic manner. We read that the children are the "pride and love" of their parents; that affection for their children is a "marked feature" of the aboriginal character (Howitt). Deep affection is quoted as their chief virtue (Gason); and as the most sincere and strongest feeling (Spencer and Gillen); and so forth. Instances might easily be multiplied. The only negative instance is the completely unreliable statement of Wilkes. This exceptional agreement of all authors and the uniform emphasis that they lay upon their statements is in itself a very strong proof not only that this assertion is true, but that these facts strongly impressed themselves upon the observers.[744] On this point our best authorities entirely agree with the remaining observers. Such an agreement on the point of a general judgment, which is necessarily an induction from a considerable number of observations, can only mean that the latter were not liable to misinterpretation; that they plainly expressed their deeper psychological meaning. These observations seem at first sight very difficult to be made correctly, for they are of a rather subtle character, referring to impalpable psychological facts. And yet all authors interpreted them correctly, of which fact such an agreement is the best proof. The expression of the feelings in question amongst savages must obviously differ very little from our ways of showing feelings. The complete agreement of the statements points, therefore, to the unmistakable clearness and strength in which the native feelings show themselves, in all the details of family life as well as in some more important facts.[745]
But even if unwilling to trust to the emphasis of our informants' general affirmations and to the agreement between them, we find many concrete details and examples, mentioned by the authors, which convince us that the conclusions they have drawn from observation were correct. Howitt says that to secure the good-will of the parents the most direct way is to admire their children; a fact which is characteristic of parental infatuation in our own society. When the children are ill the parents watch over and look after them most carefully (Schultze, Salvado, Meyer, Howitt); they make toys for their children (Mitchell, Curr, Fraser); and they look very carefully after their food (Spencer and Gillen, Dawson). On the death of a child the parents display great sorrow (Browne, Henderson, Curr in the story of old Davie).[746] And the horrid custom of carrying a dead babe on their wanderings is also a token of deep affection (Angas, Bennett, Howitt). After long absence the parents display great joy and tenderness (Chauncy). And although adoption is reported in some tribes (R. Dawson, Schultze, Salvado), nevertheless there is not always the same degree of love and affection towards adopted children as towards the offspring. And the former are often illtreated (Schultze). Such examples could easily be multiplied. And they show in how many quite unmistakable facts the main features of the parental feelings for children found their expression. These feelings as a rule consisted of love, pride, affection and attachment.
All this seems to hold good for the father, as well as for the mother. In the majority of statements both the parents are mentioned indiscriminately. Some of them say expressly that they refer to the father also (Meyer, Wilhelmi, Moore Davis, Br. Smyth, Fraser, Gason, Mathew, Spencer and Gillen, Mrs. Parker, Salvado). Nevertheless we must assume that owing to the closer tie in daily life the relationship between mother and child was a yet more intimate one (Lumholtz, Salvado). There seems to have been but little difference made between male and female children. We read in a few places (Schürmann, Spencer and Gillen) that boys were more welcome than girls, and that infanticide was more frequently carried out amongst the latter. But this is contradicted elsewhere,[747] where we read that in several tribes no difference in infanticide was made between boys and girls.
Parallel with great affection towards the children ran considerable leniency of treatment. In about eighteen of our statements (i. e. in all of those in which there is anything said about treatment besides affection) we read that the natives treat their children with kindness, absolute leniency and indulgence, never chastise them, and give them their own way in everything. It is well to notice that these two things—real love on the one hand and leniency of treatment on the other—must be treated as two independent phenomena. Affection may be perfectly well combined with severity and rigour; and a want of punishment need not be necessarily based upon love; it may result just as well from carelessness. But this latter does not seem to be the case; we know that the parents are not careless about their children; that on the contrary they take the greatest trouble about them and look carefully after all the necessities of their life. Here the leniency of treatment seems to be exclusively due to excessive fondness for their children and the resulting weakness shown towards them. In other societies the reason of the same phenomenon is often (especially in the case of male children) the wish not to frighten the boy and not to make him a coward, in which belief magical elements may also play a rôle. (Compare Steinmetz, article in Z.f.S. i.) A suggestion of such a reason is contained in only one of our statements (Roth in Trans. R.S.Q.) In general it may be said that the way in which the aborigines treat their children is a symptom of their great parental love.[748] Only in two places (Spencer and Gillen, Lumholtz) is it said that in fits of anger and impatience the natives chastise their children, and even this seems to be quite exceptional. Very interesting is Gason's statement, according to which it seems that the father was even more lenient than the mother; and this seems quite natural, for the mother had much more opportunity to get angry with the child.
It is characteristic that even those authors who write in strong terms of the bad treatment which the husband shows towards his wife (compare the statements above) say nothing of the kind as to the treatment of the children by their fathers. On the contrary, we read in several places of the tyranny of the young boy, under which often his mother and sisters and sometimes even his father had to suffer (Curr in several places, especially in the story of Old Davie; J. Moore Davies, Oldfield, Salvado). But two other writers (Lumholtz and Bonney) inform us that in spite of the entire lack of severity the children are not naughty at all, as might have been expected.
It may be safely concluded that the evidence gives a quite true picture of the parental feelings. The latter may be considered as elements which essentially characterize the relation of parents to children. And it may be said that in Australia the parents are most devoted and loving to their children. The importance of this conclusion in regard to our ideas of parental kinship in Australia has been argued sufficiently above.[749]
The facts stated in this conclusion seem to have an important bearing upon the relation between husband and wife. This point is completely ignored by the first-hand observers, who never troubled to inquire deeper into the mutual dependence of such most important sociological facts, viz. of the relationship between parents and children on the one hand and between husband and wife on the other. There are no statements on this point, and consequently one is obliged to draw the inference for oneself. But the bearing of the parental relationship upon the conjugal relations is so obvious and the mutual dependence of marriage and family so clear, that the following inference seems not at all hypothetical and arbitrary. If both parents are strongly attached to their children, if their feelings are so outspoken, these must constitute a strong binding tie between them. It is hardly possible to think that a man could be merely a brutal master and tyrant to his wife if they both had the same feelings for the same object. But it is still less possible to admit that a man and a woman would on the first occasion, or even without any reason, part and form new unions if they were both attached so strongly to the same person—an attachment which, as in so many examples, sometimes amounted to a real passion.
Turning to the other question, to be answered from our evidence—the question of paternal authority or potestas—let us first fix the meaning of the word. To the word authority (potestas) a legal sense can be given. Then it expresses the sum of the rights that legally are allotted to the father over his children. So in Rome potestas meant the absolute power of life, death and liberty that the father legally possessed over the persons of his children.[750] Every legal relation presupposes a possibility of interference or enforcement on the part of some social authority, and it assumes a set of fixed norms sanctioned in some way by society. Now we do not possess any knowledge of any such possibility in the case of the parental relationship, or of any norms that are laid down in any form by the Australian aboriginal society for the said relationship. The terms authority or potestas, therefore, cannot be used in their strict sense or indeed in any sense at all if we imply a legal meaning to them. We are more justified in applying them to the Australian natives, if we use them as an expression of the mere fact that the father could do anything he liked with his children, that he had an absolute power over them. But even here we should be careful in ascribing the exclusive power to the father. In the only cases where the question of a decision as to the child's lot arises, i. e. in the cases of infanticide and giving the girl away in marriage, there are contradictory instances ascribing the power of decision to some one else. So, for instance, in the Mukjarawaint tribe the father was not allowed to decide whether his child was to be killed or not at birth; it was the grandparents' affair. Curr affirms, on the other hand, that infanticide depended exclusively upon the father. In some tribes it was not the father's privilege to give his daughter in marriage. Nevertheless, as was shown above in [Chapter II], as a rule it was the father who disposed of his daughter.
Although our information on these points is scanty, these few hints seem to prove that there were some infringements of the father's liberty from outside. How far they were legal is difficult to ascertain. At any rate we see that the father's authority was rather limited by legal factors than enhanced. But even if this be an exceptional instance, and if as a rule nobody could interfere with the father in whatever he was pleased to do with his children—a supposition which seems fairly to agree with the general authority of the husband and the isolation of families—it must still be remembered that the father as a matter of fact never made use of his unrestricted authority. In the first place, as will be plainly shown below, the father's contact with and exclusive influence over his children ceased at the moment they reached puberty. Our question is therefore limited to the period before reaching puberty (in the boys perhaps even sooner, from about seven to ten years; see below), and eo ipso loses a great deal of its contents. A small child living with its parents alone in the wilderness is naturally entirely in their hands and at their mercy. But it would be a fallacy to lay any stress on that point. As our statements show, the child is protected against any ill-treatment, or even against any severity from either of its parents, by their own feelings much better than it could be by any legal measures. And the fact remains that the father's potestas or authority (or whatever any kind of coercive power may be called) is by no means a characteristic feature of his relation to his children, for according to aboriginal custom and psychology, any element of that kind is absolutely absent from their family life.