How many children have you Mrs. O’Flarity? he asked of her one morning.
It’s siven I have, sir, she replied. Four be the third wife of my second husband, three be the second wife of me furst.
Two young men met an Irishman. Said one: Well, Pat, what’s the news?
Divil a bit, yer honors; ’tis very dull in these parts. Have yez any news?
Yes, Pat; some very important news.
Is that so, yer honors? Phat is it?
We heard awhile ago for a fact that the devil was dead.
Is that so? Och, worra, worra! What a pity, said he, taking out some money and giving to each a quarter.
Oh, Pat, take back your money; we don’t charge you anything.