Uncle ’Rastus—I was thinking’, massa parsin, dat if de Apostle Peter had only been a cullud gemman, dat rooster wouldn’t have crowed more’n once.
I want to be procrastinated at de nex’ corner, said Mr. Erastus Pinkly.
You want to be what? demanded the conductor.
Don’t lose your temper. I had to look in de dictionary myself befo’ I found out dat procrastinate means put off.
A southern planter was asking one of his colored servants about her wedding. Yes, suh, she said, it was jes the finest weddin’ you ever see—six bridesmaids, flowers everywhere, hundreds ev guests, music, an’ er heap er praying.
Indeed, commented her master. And I suppose Sambo looked as handsome as any of them?
An embarrassed pause. Well no—not exactly, suh. Would you believe it, dat fool nigger neber showed up.