Well, get a good job done. You’ll be looking for work after the first.


Henry, where on earth have you been? asked Mrs. Jollykid when Henry got home at two bells.

I cannot tell a lie; I’ve been at the office, said Henry.

That’s where we differ. I can tell a lie—when I hear it.


He had been out late. When he reached his residence the church clock was chiming 5. Heavy, weary, disgusted, he opened the front door with some difficulty, and softly toiled up the stairs, entering his bedchamber with elaborate caution.

Thank goodness, she was asleep!

He dropped into a chair, and without taking off his coat or hat, began to remove his shoes. One he placed with great care upon the floor, but alas! as he took off the other it slipped out of his hand and fell with a loud noise.

Wifey awoke on the instant.