And how do you like Kipling? he asked.

I kippled an hour only yesterday, was her unblushing reply.


Smith—Well, but if you can’t bear her, whatever made you propose?

Jones—Well, we had danced three times, and I couldn’t think of anything else to say.


Francis Wilson tells an anecdote of Mark Twain’s aversion to barbers. It appears that a barber having kept Mr. Clemens in the chair for more than the usual period at length finished shaving him and said, Shall I go over it again?

No, drawled Mark, I heard every damned word of it.