Were you ever hurt in the mines?

Indade I was, responded the man, I was half kilt once.

Now tell the court whether you were injured at any other time, continued the cross-examiner.

Yes. I was half kilt in another accident shortly after that.

Your Honor, smilingly interjected counsel for the other side, I object to this man’s testimony.

Upon what ground? asked the judge.

On the ground that, having been half killed twice, he is a dead man and therefore incompetent as a witness.


In a suit recently tried in a Virginia town a young lawyer of limited experience was addressing the jury on a point of law, when good-naturedly he turned to opposing counsel, a man of much more experience than himself, and asked—

That’s right, I believe, Colonel Hopkins?