The Duty of American Women to Their Country

by Catharine Esther Beecher

There are many sins against such commands of God as these: “Let all things be done decently and in order.” “Whatsoever things are lovely and of good report, think of these things.” “Be ye courteous.” The violations of the rules of politeness, of neatness, and of order, come under these precepts, and school is the place, above all others, where such faults should be checked. Throwing down hats and caps, abusing clothes, tearing books, defiling desks with ink, cutting the benches, marking the walls, are faults which ought to be noticed as disobedience to these rules. So, also, rude language, calling nicknames, teasing and frightening companions, mocking the aged, or deformed, or lame, cruel treatment of birds and other animals, injuring trees, and many similar practices, should be checked by appeals to the Word of God.

In addition to this, let the benefits of refined taste and good breeding be set forth by specific examples. Show the consequences where the children of a community are rude in the streets, abuse and injure fences, milestones, graveyards, and fruit-trees, and then set forth the advantages of street politeness, of the care of our neighbours’ property, and of all that belongs to the public.

In all efforts to lead children to benevolent feelings and conduct, it is very important to set before them the example of Jesus Christ, appealing to their feelings of gratitude and love.

If a child frets at being obliged to serve another, let him be reminded that Jesus Christ has done far more for him, and that he came into this world to set us an example, that we should walk in his steps.

While it is indispensable to notice and reprove faults, it is no less important to notice and approve whatever is commendable in children. And much care should be taken to observe whatever is right, for it is much easier and much better to govern by motives of pleasure rather than those of pain.

Whenever, therefore, any cases are observed of kindness, firmness, patience, truth, and faithfulness, let them be spoken of, not in such a way as to awaken vanity, but simply with approbation as right, and worthy of imitation.

For example, if a child gives up some gratification in order to relieve some poor companion, or furnish a destitute schoolmate with clothes or books; if a child has aided or defended a companion when laughed at, or ill-treated; if another has found some tempting article, and, instead of secreting it, has sought out the owner and returned it; if, when insulted and provoked, another has refrained from angry words and all retaliation; if another has refused to believe evil of a companion, and endeavoured to stop an injurious report; if another has taken care to preserve his own premises from filth and disorder, and protected the schoolhouse and play-ground from abuse; let all such actions be presented to the school as good, and worthy of imitation. Commendation not only encourages and animates those who do well, but inspires the desire to imitate in others.

In cases where a teacher assumes the care of a school where there are many children who have formed bad habits, it is very important that he should imitate Christ in his feelings and deportment towards sinners. In such a case, it is very important to convince his pupils that, however bad they are, he is still their friend, and ever ready to do them good. He should state to them that he is aware that they have formed bad habits, and that the labour of curing them is great and difficult. He should carefully notice all attempts to do better, and where there are efforts made to improve, occasional failures should be spoken of with words of kindness, sympathy, and encouragement.

And all teachers need to be careful not to be so frequent in finding fault, and so severe in manner as to produce the feeling of hopelessness in efforts to please and satisfy. When a child feels that, however earnestly he may try to do right, he has such bad habits already formed that he shall not succeed so as to please his teacher, all motive for exertion ceases, and he becomes reckless and hardened.

The great art of curing faults is, so to secure the affection and confidence of a child, that he shall be a cheerful co-worker with his teacher, assured of approbation in success, and of forbearance and sympathy in any failure.