What a terrible night I spent; hours of restless tossing in a comfortable bed, hours of self-reproach, and despair, until at last I fell asleep.
Mr. Neville and I, after a hasty breakfast and an almost affectionate good-bye to our host, who had turned out to bid us farewell, rode away from the château. As we passed the wing in which the Princess had her apartments, I looked up at the windows, and hugged myself with joy to see a hand wave us a last greeting, and hear a sweet voice call out:
"Bon voyage!"
CHAPTER XVII
My joy, however, was transitory. That Irma should have taken the trouble to wave to us at that hour in the morning, was little more than a friendly act, although at first I had thought differently. My companion and I rode in silence; he never asked questions of a personal nature, although he was as curious as the best of us. At any rate we rode along without exchanging a word.
I left the route to him as I knew he would have worked it out before starting. Ideal companion, he let me ride along quietly, never disturbing my train of thoughts, except to say "right," or "left," as the case might be. At first, after the faint flush of joy at Irma's friendly adieu, I grew more and more despondent, and held to my villainous bad temper for a long time, but presently I began to look at things with a clearer vision, perhaps on account of the beauty of the day and the exercise. I began to see what an ass I had been and was, to have come away without giving the Princess an inkling of my feelings towards her.
I went over the conversations we had had together, and realised that nothing I had said could have conveyed in the slightest degree the fact that I was head over ears in love with her. What had I expected? Evidently that she would read my unspoken thoughts, and immediately throw herself at me, and say, "Victor, I love you." The absurdity of the idea caused me suddenly to roar with laughter, much to Mr. Neville's relief, for he turned to me with his quizzical smile and said:
"You are a nice, cheerful companion, Victor."
"I am a particular kind of damned fool."
"In this instance, yes, but we are more to blame than you are, for it ought to have been part of your education to have had numerous experiences of a similar nature. But still, I don't think there is anything to worry about, you will do better with the next one."