As is the case in most parts of the world, in Turkish towns betrothal precedes marriage, but 'courtship' is hardly possible in that country. Young girls and men are not allowed to meet one another, and consequently anything in the way of flirting is out of the question. In some exceptional cases they may, perhaps, be able to get a glimpse of each other from a distance, possibly from the windows of neighbouring houses, and quietly exchange greetings or make signs of mutual admiration, but this is all they can ever do in the direction of flirtation. Of course, girls may see, though they do not speak with, the men whose wives they may be destined to become some day, but men are strictly prohibited from meeting the marriageable members of the secluded sex. It is scarcely possible for a man to admire and love a woman except on the testimony of others as to her good looks and good qualities. In the same way, the engagements must be made through the medium of the man's lady-relations, or through that of the professional marriage-brokers. The latter are mostly old women, who will endeavour to bring about marriages, not out of good-will to the young couple or for the sake of amusing themselves, but as a matter of business. They visit houses where there are girls suitable for a would-be bridegroom; they make their proposal on his behalf to the family of that young lady of whom they most approve, a proposal which is made in a most roundabout manner, and with great tact. The answer must not come from the prospective bride; that would be considered highly improper. The decision rests with her parents or guardians. She is, no doubt, consulted, but her voice in the matter is of secondary importance. Probably, too, she does not know her own mind so well as do her sisters in more advanced lands. The matrimonial agent often repeats her visits three or four times that the matter may be well talked over, as the girl's people need to reflect, and also to make a searching inquiry about the man. If the answer be in the negative, it must be made very tactfully and politely. In some parts of Turkey they have a curious way of letting the proposers know that their offer has been declined. Over their ordinary shoes people almost always wear goloshes, and on entering a house they take them off and leave them in the entrance-hall. The servants of the house make a point of arranging the goloshes heel outwards, in such a way that when the visitor goes out he can put his feet straight into them, without having the trouble of turning them round. Now, when the agent of suitor for a lady's hand, on leaving the house, finds that her goloshes are turned with the toes towards her, she knows that the proposal has been declined.
Thus a man gets betrothed to a woman without being permitted to see his beloved fiancée until the wedding formalities are over and the marriage ceremonies are completed. Astounding tales have been related of what has sometimes happened when a husband has thus seen his wife for the first time. In one town, a man who, from the reports he had heard, was deeply in love with his betrothed, actually left the house and ran away when he drew up the long and beautifully embroidered veil that covered the lady, now his wife, and discovered that she was the ugliest creature his imagination could picture. It is easy to conceive the feelings in such a case of a man who has, on the flattering descriptions of the professional marriage-brokers, been led to believe up to the last moment in the angelic appearance of his wife. How terrible must be his disappointment when, on the day of his marriage, he unveils his dreamt-of 'beauty' and beholds a face rough and painted in the vain endeavour to conceal the ravages of smallpox, or distinguished by an ultra-Israelitish nose and topped with a pretentious wig. The unhappy case of such a disappointed husband must not, however, be overstated. Fortunately for him he does not often see other female faces, and his notions on the subject of what real beauty is are necessarily restricted by his want of experience. He is naturally of a contented disposition, believes in kismet in this as in other things, and so these physical defects do not greatly disturb his peace of mind, and it is only very rarely that he runs away from his wife.
Such matters as courtship and engagements are quite different among the agricultural and tribal people, where the girls and boys work together in the fields, in the gardens and pastures, and thus pass their early years in each other's society; their marriage in later years is generally the outcome of natural affection, first awakened by that companionship. But even in the towns it is sometimes possible for a man to make the acquaintance of a woman before marrying her. This is done by the betrothed pair arranging a secret interview, which, it is said, is usually brought about with the kind assistance of old and trusted servants. Curiously enough, the professional marriage-broker is sometimes reported to be the person who arranges this private interview; but one thing is absolutely certain, namely, that unless she is handsomely tipped, it is to her own advantage to stick strictly to the good old custom.
The wedding of a young couple itself, like their betrothal, takes place in an indirect manner. They are married in a house privately, in the presence of persons closely related to them. They do not go to any place of worship. As I pointed out before, the houses in Turkey are divided into two parts, one reserved for the male, the other for the female members of the household, and there is a long passage between the two. On the wedding-day the ladies fill up the passage, having in front of them the bride, while all the gentlemen present go to the room in the men's department which opens on to the passage, the prominent figure among them being the bridegroom. The door between the passage and the room is closed, and the most profound silence must prevail both in the passage and the adjacent room. Among the gentlemen, the father of the bride, or, failing him, any elderly man under whose guardianship or protection she may be, gets up, knocks at the door, and most solemnly and impressively asks this question, "My daughter! we are about to marry you to Mr. So-and-so, in accordance with the will of Almighty God and the ordinances of the Prophet. Will you marry him?" She gives no answer. The old man repeats the question; still she does not utter a single syllable. He asks again in a wearied manner, and this time the question is followed by a sound of sobbing inside the passage. Whether the reason of this weeping be the pressure put upon the shy and inexperienced girl in that impressive moment, or whether it be the pinches she receives from that termagant, the professional marriage-broker, and from her mischievous girl-friends who urge her to speak out, I cannot tell.
Meanwhile the bridegroom grows impatient; everyone in the audience can notice the signs of anger and anxiety on his face. The old man repeats his question a fourth time, and at last the word of consent is uttered in a very low voice from behind the door. At the same moment the bridegroom shows his feelings of relief by some motions expressive of pleasure, or by looking more than usually gratified. The old gentleman turns to him and formally asks him whether he will marry Miss So-and-so. He makes no modest hesitation, as, in his opinion, modesty is quite uncalled for here, is, in fact, an unpleasant outcome of the organised hypocrisy of society. So he answers the old gentleman's question at once, with the unblushing boldness peculiar to his sex. After this all the audience bear witness to the legitimacy of the event. A brief prayer is then recited, after which all offer their congratulations to the bridegroom. They draw up and sign the wedding-contract immediately, that it may be certified by the semi-religious magistrate called the Kadi. But the young couple are not permitted to see each other till all the marriage ceremonies are completed, and that is not till several days have passed.
A VILLAGE WEDDING PROCESSION.
Another curious custom connected with marriage is that of a bridegroom's friends beating him on the back with their fists. This is commonly the case in Turkey. At the very moment when the bridegroom is going to see the face of his wife the first time, after all formalities of the wedding are over, intimate friends and relations collect just outside the door of the female portion of the house. After wishing him a happy life, they belabour him from behind as he hurries into the ladies quarter, a proceeding which no doubt considerably accelerates his movements. The punishment is supposed to be inflicted in a gentle manner, but it may perhaps be that some of the young bachelors relieve their feeling of jealousy by making the customary blows somewhat harder than absolutely necessary.
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Before closing this chapter on the theme of the secluded sex, I ought to say something of the way in which it does its shopping, and give some description of the women-pedlars who visit the harems to display their wares. There are probably few people in this country, even among those who are interested in the world's trade, who know much about these female traders of the East. Nevertheless, in those vast tracts of the Orient where the female sex passes its life in strict seclusion, a considerable retail business of a primitive kind is transacted by wandering women-pedlars, who carry their goods round and display them in the houses of well-to-do families. Originally this trade was carried on entirely by native women, but of late a certain number of European women have embarked in it, either on their own account or as agents of small European houses. At a time when the question of spreading British commercial interests abroad is attracting so much attention, it may not be amiss to inquire into this method of trading, which, more than any other in the world, is the prerogative of women, for they alone can engage in it Of course, the business lies almost entirely among the families of Mohammedans, of whom it is estimated that Great Britain has nearly a hundred million among her subjects; it is also probable that the future will see this number largely increased. Moreover, in the territories of other powers, where the populations are largely Mohammedan, this country has vital trade interests. A lesson is to be learned from missionaries in pushing British commerce in the East. A very large proportion of the success in Oriental countries gained by missionaries is due to the ladies who assist them, for naturally they alone can get at the women of the East What applies to the spread of religion applies also to the spread of trade, and the work done by the Zenana Missions should be a sufficient indication of what a trading association on the same lines could effect. Equally it should show the British commercial houses which have considerable connections with the East that lady agents to display and sell their goods would be of great assistance to them. There are many Mussulman women who cannot go to markets and shops, and their custom would be practically assured to the firms which sent goods to their houses by lady agents, more especially such goods as are required for household use.