About the time of the attempt to assassinate the Emperor of the French by Orsini, an Englishman named Alsop was arrested in London, and afterwards tried and acquitted of a connection with the assassins.
〈ALLSOP’S BEER.〉
At a distinguished dinner-party, amongst whom was the Attorney-General of that day, there arose a question as to who Mr. Alsop was. One of the company asked, “Whether it was Allsop’s beer?” meaning, whether the prisoner was the concoctor of that delightful beverage. The gentleman to whom the question was addressed, immediately replied, “It is not at present Allsop’s beer, but,” said he, turning to the Attorney-General, “if your prosecution succeeds, it is very likely to become Alsop’s bier.”
Sydney Smith occasionally called upon me in the morning, and was ever a most welcome visitor. The conversation usually commenced upon grave subjects, and I was always desirous of profiting by the light his powerful mind threw upon the most difficult questions.
When railways first came into existence much reasonable alarm arose from the rapidity of the trains and the immense masses of matter in motion. One morning my friend called and asked my opinion on the subject. I pointed out what then appeared to me the chief sources of danger, and entered upon some of the precautions to be attended to, and of remedies to be applied.
Sydney Smith then asked me why I did not go and inform the Government of the danger and of the means of remedying it. My answer was, that such a mission would be a pure waste of time, that nothing whatever would be done until {368} some great man, a prime minister for instance, were smashed. I then continued, “Perhaps a bishop or two would do; for you know,” said I, looking slyly at my friend, “they are so much better prepared for the change than we are.”
I have heard this view of the subject assigned to Sydney Smith. It is very probable that it should have occurred to him, although I scarcely imagine he would have given the reason I did for the preference. His celebrated suggestion to the person who asked him how a man could find which way the wind blew when there was no weathercock in sight,[51] adds to the probability of Sydney Smith’s originality. On the other hand, I may support my own pretensions to independent invention by referring to a parallel remark I made many years before:—
[51] Toss up a bishop.
〈OPINION ON DUELLING.〉
At a large dinner party the subject of duelling was discussed. Various opinions were propounded as to its absolute necessity. I had made no remark upon the question, but during a slight pause somebody on the opposite side of the table asked my opinion on the subject. My reply was, I always wished that the injured man should fall. On being asked my reason for that wish, I answered, “Because he is so much better prepared for the change than the wrong-doer.” I afterwards learned, with great satisfaction, that when the ladies retired to the drawing-room, the discussion was much criticized and my reply highly applauded.