“No, but I want to try an experiment. Would it be possible for me to have a mechanical horse built that would move its legs in a passable imitation of trotting?”
“Nowadays everything is possible,” said the salesman; “but it would be very expensive.”
“Well, I’ll tell you just what I want it for,” said Mr. Tucker, and entered into details concerning Mrs. Tucker’s aversion to automobiles, her ivy-poisoning, and his scheme. The clerk seemed interested.
“If the lady’s eyes are as inflamed as all that,” said he, “she would not notice the lack of natural motion, and it would be easy to place a contrivance inside of the figure that would imitate the sound of trotting, and your wife’s imagination would do the rest. But I think that your idea of having the horse on a platform like the one out front is not a good one. If the platform struck a rock in the road it would knock the whole thing to smithereens. Better place smallish wheels on the inner side of the ankles, fix the hind legs so they will be jointed at the thighs, and then you can run up hill and down dale with no trouble.”
Mr. Tucker clapped his hands like a boy. “That’s fine! My wife will get thoroughly used to an automobile without knowing she is riding in one, and then when she recovers the use of her eyes I’ll give the wooden horse a well-earned rest. Call up that factory on the ’phone, and I’ll order my hobby-horse at once. You think that I can get it in a day or two?”
“It’s only a question of expense, sir, and you say that is nothing.”
“Of course it’s nothing. Nothing is anything if I can take my wife out automobiling without her knowing it.”
Three days later Mr. Tucker said to his wife at luncheon:
“My dear, as this is your birthday, I have given myself the pleasure of buying you a new horse and wagon, and it will be ready for us to go out in half an hour.”
“Oh, you dear, thoughtful man!” said Mrs. Tucker, beaming as well as she was able to through her smoked glasses. Then she rose and gave him a kiss that made him feel that he was a guilty wretch to be meditating the deception of such a lovable wife. But he had gone too far to retrace his steps now, and he eased his feelings with the thought that the end would justify the means.