“Carmen!” he cried, straining her in his arms. “If you go with the Americans, I shall, I must, go too!”
“Not unless it is right, Padre,” she insisted. “If it is right, nothing can keep you from going. But, unless it is God’s way––well, you can not solve your problem by running away from it.”
“But––child––to remain here means––God above! you don’t realize what it may mean to us both!”
The girl relapsed into silence. Josè began to feel that they were drifting hopelessly, abysmally apart. Desperation seized him.
“Carmen!” he cried miserably. “I have been cheated and thwarted all my wretched life! I can endure it no longer! I can not, would not, hold you here, if the way opens for you to go! But––I can not remain here without you––and live!”
“That is not true, Padre,” replied the girl, slowly shaking her head. “No human being is necessary to any one’s happiness. And progress always comes first. You are trying to ‘acquire that mind which was in Christ.’ If you are really progressing, why, you will surely be happy. But you must work it all out God’s way.”
“His way!” he retorted bitterly. “And that––”
“You must be honest, Padre, honest with Him and with everybody. If you can no longer be a priest––if you are not one, and never have been one––you must be honest with the Church and with yourself. You must see and reflect only Truth. Why do you not write to the Bishop and tell him all about it? You say you have been protecting me. But leave me to God. You must––Padre, you must––be honest! Write to your mother––write to the Bishop. Tell them both how you feel. Then leave it all with God. Do not run away. Throw yourself upon Him. But––oh, Padre dear, you must trust Him, and you must––you must––know that He is good, that He is infinite, and that there is no evil! Otherwise, the good can not be externalized. If you did that, your problem would be quickly solved.”
She rose and took his hand. “Padre dear,” she continued, “God is life––there is no death. God is eternal––there is no age. God is all good––there is no poverty, no lack, no loss. God is infinite, and He is mind––there is no inability to see the right and to do it. God is my mind, my spirit, my soul, my all. I have nothing to fear. Human mental concepts are not real. You, yourself, say so. I am not afraid of them. I look at God constantly, and strive always to see only Him. But He is just as much to you as He is to me. You can not outline how things will work out; but you can know that they can only work out in the right way. You must work as God directs. 345 Only by so doing can you solve your problem. I try always to work that way. And I have always worked for you that way. I have always thought the time would come when you and I would live and work together––always. But I have not insisted on it. I have not said that it had to be. If it works out that way, I know I would be very happy. But, even if it does not, I shall know that I can not be deprived of any good, for the good God is everywhere, and He is love, and He has given me all happiness. And now we must leave everything to Him, while we work, work, work to see Him only everywhere.”
She would talk no more. Suffering himself to be led by her, they crossed the shales to the dust-laden road and made their way silently through the burning heat into the village.