Dey vent to see de Ridualisds,
Who vorship Gott mit vlowers,
In hobes he'll lofe dem pack again,
In winter among de showers.
"Vhen de Pacific railroat's done,
Dis dings imbrofed vill pe,
De joss-sticks vill pe santal vood,"-
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to hear a breecher of
De last sensadion shtyle,
'Twas 'nough to make der teufel weep
To see his "awful shmile."
"Vot bities dat der Fechter ne'er
Vas in Theologie,
Dey'd make him pishop in his shoorsh,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent indo a shpordin' crib,
De rowdies cloostered dick,
Dey ashk him dell dem vot o'glock,
Und dat infernal quick.
Der Breitmann draw'd his 'volver oud,
Ash gool ash gool couldt pe,
"Id's shoost a goin' to shdrike six,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent polid'gal meedins next
Dey hear dem rant and rail,
Der bresident vas a forger,
Shoost bardoned oud of jail.
He does it oud of cratitood,
To dem who set him vree:
"Id's Harmonie of Inderesds,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to a clairfoyand witch,
A plack-eyed handsome maid,
She wahrsagt all deir vortunes - denn
"Fife dollars, gents!" she said.
"Dese vitches are nod of dis eart',
Und yed are on id, I see,
Der Shakesbeare knew de preed right vell,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to a restaurand,
Der vaiter coot a dash;
He garfed a shicken in a vink,
Und serfed id at a vlash.
"Dat shap knows vell shoost how to coot
Und roon mit poulderie,
He vas copitain oonder Turchin vonce,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to de Voman's Righds,
Vhere laties all agrees,
De gals should all pe voters,
Und deir beaux all de votees.
"For efery man dat nefer vorks,
Von frau should vranchised pe:
Dat ish de vay I solfe dis ding,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented oop, dey vented down,
'Tvas like a roarin' rifer,
De sighds vere here - de sighds vere dere-
Und de vorldt vent on forefer.
"De more ve trinks, de more ve sees,
Dis vorldt a derwisch pe;
Das Werden's all von whirling droonk,"
Said Breitemann, said he.