“Derraheeny.”
“Exactly—the honorable and learned—for Derraheeny. I rather like the title.”
“Well, Linton, if you are really serious—”
“Most assuredly, serious; and more, to prove it, I shall ask you to clench our bargain at once. It is not enough that you make me your nominee, but you must also render me eligible to become so.”
“I don't clearly comprehend—”
“I 'll enlighten you. Our venerable constitution, perfectly irrespective of the Tom Lintons of this world—a race which, by the way, never dies out, probably because they have avoided intermarriage—has decided that a man must possess something besides his wits to be qualified as 'Member of Parliament;' a strange law, because the aforesaid wits are all that the Honorable House has any reason to lay claim to. This same something which guarantees that a man has a legislative capacity, amounts to some hundreds a year. Don't be impatient, and come out with any piece of rash generosity; I don't want you to make a present of an estate—only to lend me one! To be qualified, either as a candidate for the House or a gentleman rider, one only needs a friend,—a well-to-do friend, who 'll say, 'He's all right.'”
“I 'm quite ready to vouch for you, Tom, but you 'll have to take the affair into your own management.”
“Oh, it's easy enough. That same cottage and the farm which we spoke of the other day, Kennyfeck can make out a kind of conveyance, or whatever the instrument is called, by which it acknowledges me for its owner, vice Roland Cashel, Esquire. This, properly sealed, signed, and so on, will defy the most searching Committee that ever pried into any gentleman's private circumstances.”
“Then explain it all to Kennyfeck, and say that I wish it done at once.”
“Nay, Cashel, pardon me. My ugliest enemy will not call me punctilious, but I must stand upon a bit of ceremony here. This must be ordered by yourself. You are doing a gracious thing,—a devilish kind thing,—it must not be done by halves. Were I to communicate this to Kennyfeck, he 'll unquestionably obey the direction, but most certainly he 'd say to the first man he met, 'See how Linton has managed to trick Cashel out of a very considerable slice of landed property.' He 'd not take much trouble to state the nature of our compact; he 'd rather blink the whole arrangement, altogether, and make the thing seem a direct gift. Now, I have too much pride on your account, and my own too, to stand this.”