A shortish neck imprisoned in a ruff,

Skin-fitting sleeves that show a stint of stuff,

A waist promoted halfway up the back,

And not a shred that's comfortably slack;

A multitude of buttons, row on row,

Not there for business—merely made for show;

A skirt whose meagre gores necessitate

The waddle of a Chinese lady's gait;

A "busby" toque extinguishing the hair,

As if a giant hand had crushed it there—